#*realises she's dead* “ah shit. well great.”

[partywithponies]

I still would've ended the show with Mike and Aluson both dying suddenly and comedically and both getting stuck as ghosts, and maybe then a new owner moving in.

[i-cant-sing]

What happens to Teen Fushiguro in the Shibuya Arc after Kenjaku & Mahito kidnap her?

Ah yes, I forgot about this one. Okay, so I imagine that they take you underground or wherever their lair is and like idk... cast spells on you to keep you from using your powers against them. You continue to threaten them, hurl insults at them and they find it amusing because 1. You're a child 2. You don't even know how easily they could kill you. 3. You're a child, why are you trying to fight the boss fights??💀

Anyways, you grow on them and they do end up becoming yanderes for you too. I mean, Kenjaku is like grandfather/guardian figure to you, and if like Getou is still alive/concious inside him, then he's like an uncle/godfather figure to you. They're bothe very protective, Getou more than Kenjaku, while Kenjaku is more like those veteran granddads who want you to become the best version of yourself and be independent, so they don't help you unless they absolutely do need to step in, but nevertheless love you. And once you do learn whatever skill/lesson he wanted you to, or actually become independent, he does not want you to use those new skills or become independent and stop relying on him for "protection" (even if u don't want it in the first place) or leave him/try to replace him. Nuh uh.

Same goes for Getou too, only he's far more gentle with you. Of course he wants you to be stronger and independent too, but he's far more likely too jump in to help you way before any true harm befalls you. He's softer in his lessons, always has that gentle smile on his face as he dodges whatever attack you launch on him. Encouraging words as he pats your head while you're on the ground trying to catch your breath.

As for Mahito, he's much more like an annoying older brother who bullies you for shits and giggles but God forbid if anyone else hurts you. I mean he'd still make fun of you for getting hurt, but rest assured whoever harmed you is now obliterated.

Your time with them is spent with Kenjaku provoking you and finding whatever it is that makes you tick and then having you spar with curses or with Mahito (who takes great joy in being a jerk). And sure, compared to all of their other victims, you're in "paradise," but in reality, your mental is taking a plunge very fast. Because Kenjaku and Mahito have realised your trigger point-

Abandonment issues.

So they use that against you. Everyday, they tell you that your father left you, that Megumi never fought hard enough for you because he didn't like you, that Gojo knew Megumi had a sister but he didn't take you in with him, and that the Zenin clan did consider you a nuisance which is why they let Gojo take you to Jujutsu High, just so that Gojo can use you as a weapon.

And sure, you'd argue that none of it is true but when a lie is told enough times, it starts to feel like the truth. So with the constant feed of negative words and being cut off from the outside world, reader couldn't help but believe all those lies, and that's how her self esteem and mental health took a turn for worse. She becomes more isolated, more quiet, more... dead. She lacks the energy to fight off those curses, not even fazed as they come a little too close to actually killing you (obv Kenjaku or Mahito step in before they can). And this is the point where they think that now that they have broken you down, they can start building you up again... and have you join their side of the battle. Of course, you're still against that, just not putting any actual effort into reacting to them, but then... they bring Megumi.

Or well, Sukuna occupying Megumi's body.

You instantly recognised them both- recognised the shift in the energy, recognised the monster who was disguised as your brother and you broke down. Fell to your knees, sobbed hard enough for your body to shake until Sukuna gathered you in his arms and moved to a private space, away from prying eyes.

You cried and cried, and Sukuna didn't need you to actually say anything for him to understand. You were mourning for your brother, who you knew has a target on his back now that he was Sukuna's vessel, who wouldnt be leaving him so easily. He just patted your back and assured you that everything will be alright if you just listen to him, made you remember how he promised that he'd always be there for you, made you promise to stick by his side and nothing bad will ever happen to you.

"Sukuna?" Your teary voice croaked, the curse king hummed in response. "Promise you won't hurt Megumi? Won't let anyone else hurt Megumi?"

Despite everything, you still cared for your brother. You didn't really need him, but the way you begged... Sukuna didn't have the heart to say no.

"Okay. Only if you listen to me." You nodded, sniffling as you rested your head against his shoulder.

From there on, I think that Kenjaku will continue to help you weild your powers to become the perfect vessel for Sukuna (who has actually no intention of using you as a vessel, no he just wants you by his side for eternity, all for him to spoil and pamper). You follow Sukuna's rules, stay indoors and only come out when he let's you accompany him, sometimes he'd let you enter his domain expansion so that you could meet Megumi, who tries to convince you run for your life and don't worry about him.

Now, I like to think that a point comes when Gojo is finally free from the prison realm and is now ready to beat everyone's asses, and that's when Sukuna mentions how he has been having a good time with you, which only provokes Gojo to fucking murder him and even Megumi, before he finally decides to just beat his ass and look for you (probably when you stop Gojo from killing Megumi) and that's how Gojo ends up snatching you away as you scream for Sukuna to not kill Megumi, beg Gojo to let you go because Sukuna would kill Megumi if you're not there. And all of this sounds like Stockholm syndrome to Gojo and the gang, who again, keep you under lock and key.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Jack Bass x Younger!Reader || Oneshot

Title: Bass's.

Notes:

I have no idea when this is supposed to be set. Just go with it.

I have two things to say about Jack in this gif, though. 1. Does he not know how to carry a tray. And 2. I love this statement, here. Its like 'Bart's Dead, Chuck. I can barely contain my joy, Chuck. Its taking all my willpower, Chuck, to keep a monotonous expression. Also Chuck I am carrying a tray, do you see this?'

Plot: Bart Bass decides to be his creepy fucking self (Not that Jack is exponentially better in any way but whatever) towards you, Chuck's best friend- but thankfully, Jack accidentally walks in on the scene and gives you a get out of jail free card.

Good old 'lesser of two evils' shit. I love stuff like that.

Warnings: BART BASS being predatory, and a bit of age difference (You and Jack. I'm going by actors ages though so there's only a, like, 11 year age gap between him and Chuck which is not that bad if you ask me). Sexual references.

~~~

Chuck looks from his phone, that's flashing Blairs name, to you and your big, wide eyes and lips mouthing 'Don't you dare', then to his father quietly tapping away on his phone on the couch a few feet away... then back at his phone.

"Charles- " You hiss, prepared to threaten his very existence but he cuts you off first- slipping off the bar stool beside you and heading for the hallway.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom."

Why am I friends with him again!? You think, but stay quiet and hope that Bart doesn't realise that you're back there despite having said hello to you earlier when he came in. You think, if you stay quiet like a mouse, he will forget your existence and keep texting until Chuck gets back- although, who knows how long he and Blair can go on for.

Depends what its about, honestly. If its about revenge or espionage... well, the conversation could last quite some time.

Should I just leave?

The impulse to run away is a strong one, as you sit there with your cheeks heating up and you start to feel nauseated. You never liked Bart Bass, from the moment you met him. Before that, actually. You had heard Chuck talking about him to Nate before you even became friends with them, and none of what you heard was good. And then you did meet him, one day when Chuck invited you over to do a school project. Or 'school project' as he so obnoxiously put it. You really did end up just doing a school project, though. Hence your friendship nowadays. Bart was creepy towards you even then, at 16 with terribly died hair and the wrong eyeshadow.

You've been very careful since then to never be alone with him like this. You would talk to him at parties if you were forced to, say hello to him when Chuck had you at his place and the man walked by, but that is the extent of your communication with the creep. Always, always, someone would be around. Chuck, mostly. But also staff, or Nate, or random fundraiser ladies, or Jack who Chuck the bastard never left alone with all willy-nilly like this, unfortunately, or Lily, or literally anyone else possible on the earth.

You've even hidden away in the men's bathroom, which is disgusting no matter how expensive the restaurant, with Nate before to get away from this man when Chuck once ditched you both at a dinner with him. And that's the story of how you got your first kiss, too, and it was from Nate Archibald. Hell yes.

That's how much this man makes you want to grab your bag and flee.

But you don't. You stay glued to your seat, super still, listening only to the tap-tap-tapping noises that Bart makes and the bump-bump-bump noises your heart is making right into your throbbing ears.

Until it stops.

Not the bump-bump-bumping, oh no. The tapping. And, nightmarishly, it's replaced by a groan and footsteps coming towards your turned back.

"Y/N," As soon as he says your name, his hands fall on your your shoulders and you literally jump under his touch. Shit- Shit- Fuck- what's happening- "I've been meaning to speak with you recently but Chuck- ah. Well you know him. He refused to share with me your telephone number. But I knew you'd turn up here at some point, so not to worry."

"Uh... right." You cant even force yourself to be your normal, cheery, polite self in this position. You just want him to get. off. of. you.

"Did you want a drink?" He asks, in that possibly cheery (But only because its slightly louder then his usual husk level) but mostly still scary voice he uses to convey emotion, letting go of you thankfully and rounding to the other side of the bar. You shake your head, though. He raises his brows, picking out a scotch for himself. "You don't drink? Shocking, seeing as you're friends with my son."

Oh I drink. You think, giving him a shrug. Just not in situations like this one. Also, what must he think of Chuck? Jesus Christ. For sure, your boy likes debauchery but what's wrong with that?

"Well, I like that." Bart pauses before pouring his drink, to appreciate you. "Mature."

Damn it. It makes your skin absolutely crawl.

"So... " You take a deep breath, tucking your hair back behind your ears rather then ruffling it back like you usually would to get it out of your face- lest that be recognised as some kind of extremely subtle form of flirting. God, fear makes you think weird things. "What did you want to discuss?"

"Oh- Just, your future. Where are you going to school? Will you be sticking close to us?"

Us? US? No, I'll be far far away, from you.

You don't really want to tell Bart where you're going to be going to school, because in your fear addled brain you know that that will just lead to 'Which campus?', or 'Where will you be staying?' and you really don't want it to go there.

You're just taking another, shakier deep breath, when the front door of the apartment opens and shuts loudly and set of feet trample down the hallway towards you. Immediately total relief plashes over you and you wipe your face. Oh, thank god.

Jack Bass appears in the doorway to the living room, looking as put-together yet somehow simultaneously still totally relaxed, as always, and forces aa polite smile onto his handsome face. "Brother. Y/N? Its good to see you."

You have no idea. "Good to see you too Jack. Uh- Chuck's in the bathroom."

"Thanks. For that... enlightening, information, Y/N. I needed that." You cheeks flare up in embarrassment, but ultimately you just roll your eyes as Jack flashes you a subtle wink, and turns promptly to his - much, - older brother. "Bart."

The older brother in question looks less then pleased at his baby brothers appearance in his home. Right now. And he possibly isn't thrilled about that little wink, either. Like you two are in on some kind of joke together. "Jack... What are you doing here?"

"Simmer down, bro. Just visiting." Even you know that that excuse is weak, but anything that comes out Jack's own monotonous voice right now is blessed where you're concerned so you certainly don't say anything. Or make any faces, which would be more appropriate. "Y/N, I don't think Bart-man here's too happy about my presence." Hm, no. You'd have to agree with that observation- not that you've looked up at Bart since Jack came in. You wont risk it. Jack glides through the room with the practised grace of a man who's lived 3 quarters of his life in suits and the other, happier quarter in board shorts, and ends up right next to your chair, an arm resting on the bench in front of you.

If you weren't already so nervous about Bart, you would blush about Jack.

"At least tell me you're glad to see me."

You grin, which is less forced then you thought it would be prior to trying it. Damn, he's good. You think, realising he just swepped in here and made you comfortable in less then 50 words. "Always, 'Uncle Jack'."

"Oh," He groans, like it physically pained him to hear you tease him like that. A tiny smirk even slips through his usually emotionless - well, not emotionless. He has one standing colour, that being sly, - stone statue of a face. "'Uncle Jack'- Please, stop. I'm barely a decade older then you."

That's enough to make anything else possible, inappropriate. Unfortunately. "Hey, I said I'm glad to see you." You wink, a bit sly yourself. "Count your blessings."

His grin widens a bit, like the dangerously charming Cheshire cat-type that he is. Genes that Chuck inherited, clearly, if his track record with girls say anything at all, but that Bart obviously missed out on. "You've got a point."

"She's a remarkable young woman." Bart pipes up, making your stomach tie itself up in knots again, and you immediately revert your gaze to your lap. Remarkable young woman... you want to barf. "Who, I was actually having a conversation with before you burst in here, unannounced." He takes a slow sip of his drink, then mutters. "And uninvited."

"Well that's great." Jack straightens up, clapping his hands together and finally showing his teeth in a smile. They're really freaken white, compared to his skin, deeply tanned by the hot Australian sun. "A visit would be kinda uncomfortable without a conversation; I'll join. I can converse with the best of 'em, Bart. I assure you."

"It was private." The old man sneers, thinking that he's got the upper hand on Jack, and all you can do is hope to god that he's wrong.

Jack turns his head back to look at you, and you meet his gaze tentatively. Your eyes scream, 'Please don't leave me alone with that guy'. He promptly looks back to Bart. "Well Bart why don't we ask the lady in the room what she wants? We are gentlemen here aren't we?" Then Jack makes a face, all crumpled up and unsure, for a moment. "Err. Well actually... 'gentleman' might be a bold faced lie. We'll ask anyway. Y/N! Do you mind if I weigh in here?"

"Not at all." You say quickly, flashing a tiny, thankful smile. He gives you another wink- this time actually subtle. So Bart didn't see it. Your smile gets a little bit bigger, relaxing. He's got you.

"Great." You watch him pull out the stool beside you, that Chuck - who has still not returned from his phone call with Blair. You assume some, likely cruel vengeance must be involved. Possibly involving that Humphrey guy, - had vacated and settles down in it. He then sets his arms firmly on the bench and looks up attentively at Bart, not breaking eye contact with him. Boy these Bass's like their stare downs. "So?" He prompts, expectantly. And a little arrogantly- a Bass speciality that you truly don't mind at all. "What's on the agenda, today?"

Bart glares heatedly, back.

~

Throughout the awkward discussion between the three of you, which your good friend Chuck has yet to return to discover - at this point you're resigned to him having climbed out the window and scaled the building probably, - , Jack constantly, skilfully changes the subject for you whenever Bart rears to close to somewhere uncomfortable. He makes jokes that make you laugh, he nudges you with his elbow at times - but never touches you any more then that, although you honestly wouldn't mind it if he did, - and takes the attention off you a lot. At times you truly thought you saw steam come out of Bart's ears.

When finally Bart gives up and excuses himself, saying he as an early dinner with Lily, you feel exhausted and relieved. After the door swings shut behind him, you cover your face with your hands and deeply sigh.

"So, what was that about? You looked like a trapped mouse. I recognise that look, I invented that look." You pull back slightly from your hands and glance over at him, to see him thoughtful for a moment. "Well, not by making it. By... causing... it... Either way, it was not good." He shakes his head, taking a sip of his own drink - scotch, - that he made Bart pour for him; Raising his eyebrows at you for an explanation over the rim of the glass.

Jack's always been great, like this. Even when he was horrible, he was the lesser of two evils between him and Bart. Good for a laugh and quality eye candy in a pinch- and that counts for a hell of a lot when it comes to surviving Bart Bass and the Upper East Side. And he had the power and pull of an adult, but knew what the hell was going on like one of you.

So he always made you feel at ease.

You ruffle your hair back, and sigh, straightening your back finally from their hunched over position they live in when you're uncomfortable and pushing back your shoulders. "He was just, saying some weird stuff... and Chuck disappeared to talk to Blair." At that, Jack nods in total understanding. Like ah, yeah. Got ya. Finally, you shrug. "He just makes me really uncomfortable. No offence, but I hate your brother."

As you watch Jack's eyes don't even flicker; He's totally on board with what you've said. Then he finishes the rest of his scotch in one gulp. "Ahh- I hate him too."

"As do we all." Chuck's voice suddenly pops up, as he appears in the doorway like Jack had earlier. You have to practice some serious self control so as to not laugh, at Chuck so coincidentally turning up again at the perfect moment to proclaim his hatred for his father. Jack grins back at Chuck coldly, nodding. Yeah. "Anyway, Y/N, I apologise but I'll be having to abandon you. Blair's waiting for me at her, empty, apartment." He pauses for a moment for dramatic effect, in perfect Chuck Bass fashion, and you roll your eyes, grinning. Jack smirks. "But you're welcome to stick around a while and help yourself to the amenities All on my tab, of course. Good to see you again, Jack." Then he pockets his phone and heads toward the door. The second Bass of the day leaves the building.

"Bye, nephew!" Jack waives as the elevator doors close behind Chuck then swiftly turns around back to you, to which you raise your eyebrows. "So, what do we do now?"

"I dunno." Shrugging you grin and turn your stool to angle your legs towards Jack. "When Chuck says those magical words 'All on my tab'," Those words, oh; You speak them with just as much raw, breathy sexual arousal as the man himself would. As the words demand. 'All on my tab'. Good lord, sex if they were words. "I tend to take advantage."

"An easy girl to please; That's what I like to see." Your cheeks flame up at those words out of Jack's mouth as he turns to look down at the room service menu. Yes, Jack Bass has toed the line, between platonic and flirtatious since the very moment you met the man... but that seemed a little bit more then toeing the line.

And you get a far different reaction to him doing it then you do the other Bass brother.

You don't even really mind the implications of his words.

"You're staying back with me?" You ask, feeling hopeful at the idea.

"Yeah well, I cant in, uh, good conscience," He makes a bit of a show to you, of pressing his hand to his chest totally earnestly as those words 'good conscience' come out of his mouth. "leave you here unguarded in case Bart comes back, can I? Besides, the way you said 'All on my tab'- man, you could sell moonshine at an AA meeting with that voice."

"Ha," You laugh, rolling your eyes and shaking your head. "Well, thanks."

"Oh. Don't thank me. You're just using what uh, your mama gave you. I actually encourage you totally, to do that more often- "

"No!" You exclaim, sighing in exasperation; But there is still a smile on your face you cant seem to shake. "For not leaving, today. When you walked in. It would've sucked if you had, not that I would've blamed you at all."

"Hey, just call me your knight in shining armour." He doesn't look up from the menu, flicking through it. Then turns to you with one of those beach boy/politician, toothless grins of his. "Besides you were automatically, my favourite person in the apartment. I mean, anyone with... uhhh- different, appendages to what I have, instantly gets a one-way ticket access to my rare bouts of chivalry. Now come over here, pick out what you want off here."

You just gape at him and that comment, making him stifle a laugh and return to the menu himself.

Bass's.

[gimmezutara]

Drabble that came to me earlier when reading hc’s about the steam babies:

Kya whirled around the kitchen grabbing various tea leaves. She expertly arranged the tray and swept past the counter to serve another customer.

She loved working at her Grandpa’s tea shop. It was refreshing and so different from the palace she was used to spending her days in. This place was absolutely bustling with activity and here she had more freedom than she ever did back in the Fire Nation. Here, she wasn��t Kya, Crown Princess of the Fire Nation, she could just be… Kya.

Iroh smiled as he watched her work. He loved the summers he got to spend with his granddaughter. She was always so keen to help out and was a ray of sunshine to his days.

She rushed past him again pulling a funny face and Iroh laughed.

She put her dirty tray down and bumped into Ran at the sink. “Hey, watch it Ky!” he complained as the bump knocked his arm straight into the sink.

“Are you a waterbender or aren’t you?” she teased, reaching for her notepad and pen.

“Yeah, but doesn’t mean I like being soaked,” he replied sulkily. “How come you get to serve and I’m stuck doing the washing up?”

“Wanna swap? There’s plenty of people who’d love to chat with the Prince of the Fire Nation out there,” she said, offering the pen and notebook with a knowing smile.

Ran rolled his eyes and tipped his head back with a weary sigh. “Why did Mum and Dad send us to work here again? You know I could’ve been at Ember Island with Shomo and Raoko right?”

“Doing really productive things I’m sure,” Kya said sarcastically.

Ran huffed, his fringe flying away from his face as he went back to his reluctant cleaning.

Kya bent under the counter to pick up a dish rag.

“Excuse me?” came a voice from above.

“Just a second,” she said, before she tossed the rag back in the sink behind her (feeling satisfied at the groan from her brother) and turned back to see the most gorgeous face she had ever seen in her life. She didn’t know eyes could be that green! He must be an earthbender, surely.

She suddenly realised she’d been gawping at him completely silent.

“Uh, what can I do for you?” she said, tucking her hair behind her ear and tugging the ends nervously, a habit she seemed to have picked up from her mother.

“Can I get a ginger tea please?” he asked.

“Oh yeah sure!” she said a tad too loudly. “You sit down and I’ll be right with you!”

She hastily made her way to the kitchen to make the tea, knocking the whole pot over in the process. “Shit…” she muttered to herself.

“Are you alright, Kya?”

She jumped at Iroh’s voice. “Yep, absolutely fine!” she said a little too quickly.

She prepped the tray, steeled herself and made her way out into the seated area. She caught his eyes and felt herself smile. Then she tripped over the green rug in the middle of the floor. With lightning reflexes she managed to right herself just as a tan hand appeared to steady the tray. “Are you ok?” the boy asked.

Kya’s eyes widened. She laughed awkwardly. “I’m fine, just fine,” she said, feeling the tips of her ears burn with a blush as she took the tray from his hands and placed it on the table. “Sorry, I spilled your tea a bit,” she said, “I can get you another-”

“No no, it’s alright,” the boy said with a kind smile.

“Ok, um, great,” Kya said. She nodded her head at him and made her way back to the kitchen as fast as possible.

***

The next few days the boy returned every day. One afternoon Kya was leaning on the countertop lost in her imagination.

Iroh watched from his usual seat. He followed her gaze to the handsome Earth Kingdom boy sitting by the window and chuckled to himself.

He rose from his seat and joined his granddaughter at the counter. “It appears we have a new regular!” he said.

Kya was startled from her daydreaming. “Oh, uh, yes. I mean… who?”

Iroh gestured. “He is a handsome boy is he not?”

Kya blushed. “I… wouldn’t know. I guess,” she said, winning the award for worst nonchalant answer in the world.

“Shame he always sits by himself,” Iroh said. “I would have thought he would have a girlfriend.”

“Do you think he does?” Kya asked a little too quickly.

Iroh laughed to himself but kept his features neutral. “I shouldn’t think so,” he said.

Kya’s face melted with relief. “Ok. That’s good. I mean… that’s fine. Why would I care?”

They stood in silence for a while. “I’ll take over for a while my dear, you could do with a rest,” Iroh said. “Why don’t you go and accompany our new patron?”

“What?” Kya said, instinctively clutching the notebook and pen to her. “No no no, I couldn’t do that, I couldn’t possibly-”

“Make polite conversation with our new, generous customer?”

Kya paused, stumped for a response. “Uh- no-”

“Great! You have a rest,” Iroh said, taking the notebook and pen from her gently but firmly and shooing her away from the counter.

Kya stood frozen, wrestling with herself for a bit.

She turned to face the table. She sighed and drew herself up straighter and made her way over.

“Uh, hi,” she said. The boy looked up at her and smiled.

“Hi,” he said.

“It’s- uh- nice to see you again. Here. You’re a- um- good customer,” she said. Her brain screamed at her.

The boys lips quirked up into an unfairly gorgeous smile. “Uh, thanks,” he said. “Are you… still working?”

“Me? Oh, um, my Gra….boss just said- it-it’s my break,” she managed.

The boys face lit up. “Oh well, please feel free to join me,” he said, gesturing to the chair opposite.

“Ok, thanks,” she said, managing to get through at least one sentence without stumbling over her words. Short as it was, she’d count it as a victory.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before,” the boy said.

“Oh yeah, I’m just here for the summer,” she replied.

“Where are you from?” he asked.

“The Fire Nation,” she said.

“Ah, I thought so. I mean, I didn’t want to assume, but-”

“Golden eyes gave it away huh?” she said. It was a pretty dead giveaway, even if her lightly tan skin and curly hair gave away her Water Tribe heritage.

The boy nodded, smiling a bit sheepishly. “Firebender?” he asked.

She nodded. “Earthbender?” she asked.

He smiled and nodded too.

***

Kya readied herself for her night out.

“You tell anyone I went out, you’re dead,” she threatened her brother.

“Sheesh, calm down, I’m not telling on anyone,” he said from his position lying on the couch. “Just… be careful Kya ok?”

She rolled her eyes at him. “I’ll be fine,” she said.

“Oh and you better not bring him back here, ok? I’m not sharing an apartment with you and your new lover.”

She threw a pillow at him. “Same to you and your new fancy lady!” she retorted.

Ran’s face fell. “I- what?”

“Don’t think I didn’t notice you sneaking out last week!”

“I didn’t- she’s not-” Ran began before his face fell into a scowl and he growled in frustration. “Real nice, blackmail from the future Fire Lady, that’s comforting.”

“Shut up,” she retorted with a smile. She took one last glance in the mirror before she set off.

***

Later that night she crept back into the tea shop, a soft flame burning in her palm to light the way. She could hear her brother’s loud snores from outside the room. She carefully put her pack on the side and went to grab some water from the sink.

Suddenly a loud snore from the sofa made her jump and almost drop the cup. She quickly caught it and snapped her head round. She silently made her way to the sofa and peeked her head over it.

Iroh was fast asleep on the couch.

She breathed a sigh of relief and carefully crept back to the kitchen, putting the cup back in its place before quietly going back to her room.

The door closed with a soft click.

The snoring from the sofa ceased and Iroh carefully lifted his head to glance around the room. Then he chuckled to himself.

***

“Ah, you are both here!” Iroh said, greeting the Fire Lord and Lady enthusiastically. “We have had the most wonderful time! Ran’s been working hard in my shop and Kya has been wonderful as always. She’s even made some new friends,” he said. He glanced over at Katara with a twinkle in his eye.

Katara caught his look. She knew that look. Her gaze flicked over to her husband who, as usual, hadn’t noticed his Uncle’s tell tale signs of having some juicy gossip.

“Sit down, you must tell me all about your trip over,” Iroh said, shooing them into seats around the table.

Just then the door opened and Kya walked through, lost in a world of her own.

“Kya!” Zuko said excitedly. Kya jumped, startled at the sudden presence of her parents.

“Dad! Hi!” she said, her startled face melting into a smile.

“How’s my little sunbeam?” Zuko asked, coming over to give her a hug.

“Great, Dad,” Kya said as he squeezed her tight. She made her way over to Katara giving her a hug too.

“Had fun with Grandpa?” Zuko asked.

Kya beamed. “Of course! I actually said I’d look after the kitchen this morning though so…” she said, backing towards the door.

Zuko smiled. “Of course, I’ll come and help get heaters going.”

“Dad, I’m a firebender, you haven’t had to help me with that since I was like three,” she complained.

“Let your Dad be of assistance if he wants,” Katara said, with a patronising pat on Zuko’s shoulder. He arched an eyebrow at her and she nudged him playfully before turning back to his daughter.

Katara eyed Iroh suspiciously over the rim of her cup as Zuko and Kya left the room. Iroh’s face was impassive, as always, but Katara knew he was dying to tell her something.

“Iroh…” she said.

“Yes?” he asked.

“What do you know?”

Iroh looked around conspiratorially and leaned in. “Kya’s got a boyfriend,” he said excitedly.

Katara laughed. “Who?” she asked.

“There’s a handsome boy who comes to the tea shop, you should see her, she’s been daydreaming about him all day every day since she first laid eyes on him!”

“Oh spirits,” Katara said in mock despair.

“Reminds me of a Water Tribe girl I once had working here who could barely make the right orders because she was too distracted by the other server.”

Katara’s face suddenly became amusingly affronted. “I did not make the wrong orders! And I was not ogling Zuko!” she said.

Iroh laughed. “I believe I said ‘distracted’, my dear,” he said.

Katara blushed, as if the idea of being attracted to her husband of twenty years was still embarrassing, making Iroh laugh even more.

“What’s this boy like?” Katara said, a hint of concern in her voice. She knew her daughter could handle herself but she was all too familiar with how vulnerable feelings for someone could make you, and how much it could hurt when it didn’t go well.

“He’s very kind,” Iroh said reassuringly. “You know the day she met him she tripped over, spilled his tea everywhere!”

Katara laughed. “Oh spirits, I’d hoped she wouldn’t take after her father in this respect…”

Iroh laughed too.

Zuko walked back in and the two quickly fell quiet and went back to sipping their tea.

Zuko paused by the table. He regarded them both suspiciously.

“What did I miss?” he said, his tone heavy with suspicion.

“Nothing, my son,” Iroh said dismissively. “I was just telling Lady Katara here that it is important to spice up a marriage after such a long time together.”

Katara choked on her tea.

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - May 2

I know I say every week that I read a lot this week but I have been indulging in my favorite coping technique and so this list is ridiculously long. Twitter encouraged me. Blame them. 

**Indicates my recent favs 

~*~ 

On the inherent homoeroticism of cake decoration by welcoming_disaster (616/8K)

“She’s matchmaking, Barton,” Carol sighed.

“We,” Thor corrected, thumping himself hard in the chest, “art matchmaking.”

“Who, Cap n’ Tony?” Clint asked, his mouth full.

“Cap and Tony,” Janet confirmed, cutting herself a thin slice of egg and gently depositing it on her whole grain avocado toast, “it’s getting ridiculous.”

“Wait, I thought they were—“ Clint frowned, glancing around the room as though to confirm. Nothing but confused faces met his questioning gaze. “Huh. I really thought they were fucking.”

“And there is the crux of the issue,” Jess licked a bit of spaghetti sauce off her lip.

“Aye,” agreed Thor, “there’s rub.”

-----------

The team tries to set up Steve and Tony. Things don't go as planned.

Baby lovers like you and me (never say die) by FestiveFerret (Old Guard AU/7.5K)

The Avengers. They'd found him frozen in the ice, told him he was immortal, of all things. And with the way he'd lived through seventy years deep in the Atlantic, he found himself inclined to believe them. They'd also been very… convincing.

Without question, they integrated him into their unit - The Avengers, a secret team of unkillables seeking wrongs around the world and making them right, supported and housed by an enigmatic billionaire named Tony Stark. Their immortality, it seemed, was a secret to everyone but him.

Ready, set, bake by ChocolateCapCookie (Great British Bake Off/11k) 

The Avengers are on a nationally televised baking competition, but nobody seems to have warned the producers that the Avengers, while they save the world everyday and put their loves at risk doing so, are a) insanely competitive, and b) absolutely terrible bakers. Steve Rogers, especially, has a competitive streak a mile wide, and he's determined to win this competition, but it's not easy when his only real opponent is also the man he's been in love with for years.

***To make flowers grow (in this barren heart) by SoldiersShield, KakushiMiko (Hanahaki AU/16K) 

“You hide yourself away in your technology, but you are just as human as the rest of them. Your heart betrays your desire to possess.” Her gaze falls to the arc reactor, and Tony's blood runs cold in his veins.

“The Earth will reclaim what we have lost,” she says, dragging a hand over the chestplate of the armor. “It is you, and your kind-- your greed that pulls life from the soil as if it were nothing. You will reap what you have sown, Stark. The avarice in your heart will strangle the very life out of you.” Arna meets his eyes once more, a serene smile on her face as she leans forward.

“I hope he is worth dying for,” she murmurs, before digging her hand into his ribcage.

(Tony Stark falls in love with Steve Rogers. A rogue enchantress ensures he pays for it.)

Shelter from the storm by silkspectred (KidFic/5k) 

Tony adopts a baby. Guess who's Majorly Fucked Up™ about it.

Keep on beating by itsallAvengers (Domestic Fluff/6K) 

There were an awful lot of things Steve loved about Tony. But one thing in particular Steve could never get enough of was his heartbeat.

The good or bad thing by petreparkour (Multiverse/10k) 

 “It’s the metal suit,” Thor informed Steve, his normally-booming voice tinny over the SHIELD comms. “What did Stark call it—Iron Man?”

“But he’s down here,” Steve protested as the Hulk roared in Stark’s face, startling him into waking with a shout. “How could—”

“It’s damaged,” Thor reported. “But it looks different. More advanced. And he—ah. He’s carrying you, Captain.”

“Please tell me nobody kissed me,” Stark breathed out, and then Stark’s voice suddenly came over the comms, but the man lying next to him hadn’t moved.

“Guys, come on, you’re killing me here. What is it, 2012? God, I hate time travel. First, I'm fighting Thanos. Now, I have to deal with my past self and Thor's bad haircut? Oh my God, Cap, yes I hacked their comms, they’re my comms.”

Steve nearly opened his mouth to protest that he hadn’t said anything when he realized that this replica of Tony Stark wasn’t speaking to him.

***The tipping point by nightwalker (Domestic Fluff/7K) 

Tony has a few quirks. Steve's still trying to figure them all out.

We two, how long we were fool’d by glassessay (Soulmate AU/9K) 

Steve Rogers comes into the world as unblemished as his mother. When Anthony Stark is born, his soulmark is an obvious pattern of ink across his tiny chest.

It only takes a century, two names, and a shared love of Walt Whitman for them to find each other.

The tape in the cave by betheflame (Canon Divergent/5K) 

Steve had no idea what was happening.

“You think I didn’t know that?”

Tony was staring Zemo down as though the Sokovian was actual vermin - which, Steve reflected, he kind of was.

“You think that I,” Tony continued, not hiding the sneer in his voice, “Anthony Stark, who has more powerful technology in my literal fingers than most nations have, that I wouldn’t know everything possible about how my parents died? That I wouldn’t know it wasn’t an accident, that your silly little HYDRA Nazi knock-off pals are the ones who murdered them? Please, you are pathetic.”

Happy ending by Robin_tCJ (No-Powers AU/28K) 

 Steve is a mobile massage therapist, and Tony is a stressed billionaire. What could go wrong?

With a decent happiness by torigates (Teacher AU/16K) 

Tony Stark is Iron Man. Steve Rogers isn't, and never was Captain America.

Or, the one where everything is the same except Steve is a kindergarten teacher.

Nothing left but scars by SailorChibi (MCU/6.7K) - Reread

Steve wakes up to the fact that no one ever compliments or even says thank you to Tony, and that he has fallen into the same trap of painting Tony with a specific paintbrush.

This is how he showers a very confused Tony with praise to make up for it.

Our hearts should remember and follow by frostfall (MCU/5K) 

Steve hums. “I didn’t know you could play. Or sing. Don’t think I’ve heard anyone mention it before.”

Tony shrugs. “It’s one of the few things, skills, I don’t flaunt. Not something people are interested in, anyway. Not gonna sway any board members by playing fucking Für Elise for them. Sides’, there’s a high chance I wouldn’t even play. Well, maybe if you get me drunk enough and near an instrument. Then, I might reconsider.”

(After a dream leaves Tony rattled, he turns to the piano as a way to distract himself.)

Finally, you and me by pensversusswords (Multiverse/10K) 

Because in every layer of time, in every conceivable dimension, he was always meant to love Steve.

By some miracle, Steve was meant to love him back.

***Full disclosure not required (but appreciated) by Potrix (Identity Porn/16k) 

The one where Steve knows more than he lets on, Tony knows less than he pretends, Clint has a big mouth, Bucky is a little shit, and everyone learns why keeping secrets never ends well.

Almost never, anyway.

Heartlines by nanasekei (MCU/7.9K) 

“Let me,” Tony repeats. He regrets it deeply, so much, he wants to stick the words back into his mouth again, and it must show, in the way his voice wavers. He feels exposed, all of a sudden, as if he’s asking something bigger than what he can actually say. Let me touch you, let me take care of you. “Just… Let me do it.”

i found a way to let you in, but i never really had a doubt (marriage series) by quidhitch (Marriage Series/16k) 

Tony Stark doesn’t believe in marriage. It’s nobody’s fault. —Well, it’s Howard's fault, probably, but Tony doesn’t like to think about that for too long, finds that it dredges up all sorts of issues he’d rather keep buried under a mountain of strategically employed sarcasm, humorous self-deprecation, and the occasionally effective substance abuse.

***Hide your love away by sineala (Soulmate/33K) - Reread

Tony has suspected for a long time that the soulmark on his chest matches Steve's -- but he's never told Steve about it. And then it's too late to tell Steve anything at all ever again. In the wake of Steve's death, the Skrull invasion, and Norman Osborn's rise to power, the identity of his soulmate is just one of the many things Tony cuts out of his memory forever.

When Tony returns to consciousness, he's forced to deal with the aftermath of a war he no longer remembers fighting, not to mention a Steve Rogers who can barely stand to be in the same room with him. Surely the last thing Tony could ever need in his life is more amnesia. But that's what he gets. And Tony's new missing memory just might be the key to finding out the truth of his soulmark... as well as his chance to make things right once and for all.

Break the chain (can’t live in circles again) by orphan_account (FWB/19K) 

There had been seven amazing weeks of dating Steve Rogers before Tony realised that they weren’t dating at all. And then it was a scramble to adjust to the situation as it had always been: being Steve’s friend-with-benefits.

And if Steve seemed a little confused and bewildered by the way Tony was acting, well. Tony was probably just misreading that, too.

Five times steve and tony (tried to) bail each other out of jail by Teyke (MCU/6k) 

Twice before Civil War, twice after, and once during. For very loose definitions of both 'bail' and 'jail'.

Cracked hearts under iron ribs by XtaticPearl (Established Relationship/14k)

Rhodey is away for almost six months now and comes to meet Tony after the mission. He doesn't understand the domesticity of the whole Tower and unknowingly sets off a whole truck of insecurities which make Tony crawl back into being a Stark instead of just Tony. The team is not at all happy and Rhodey joins them in trying to figure out a way to help their resident genius feel better in his skin.

The single biggest problem with communication by BlossomsintheMist (616/108K)

In the wake of Steve's return from the dead and the end of Norman Osborn's reign of terror, the superhero community is recovering--Steve has taken on a new role and Tony is trying to put his life back together. Things are still awkward between them, but they're determined to put things to rights. But when a discussion about their feelings leads to further misunderstandings, they discover that might be more difficult than either of them realized. Set in the early Heroic Age after the end of Dark Reign, this is a get-together story about crossed wires--and second chances.

What are friends for? by bobertsmallismydad (MCU /2.8K) 

In which Steve is targeted by a virus. Will the Avengers be able to save him in time?

Starving by festiveferret (Vampire AU/2K) 

Steve woke up starving.

***Everybody wonders (What it would be like to love you) by SoldiersShield (MCU/3K) 

“...Is that what this is about?” He asks slowly. Steve blanches.

“Oh my god. It is.” Tony has no right looking as giddy as he does. “Steven Grant Rogers, are you jealous?”

--

Or: Steve and Tony have been dancing around each other for a while now, and Steve's rather content with it. Attending a gala together just might change that.

Re(A)d all over by brandnewfashion, MusicalLuna (Drunk Flirting/3k) 

Contrary to popular belief, Tony Stark can blush.

It just takes Steve getting drunk on some magical Asgardian mead for it to finally happen.

***The Do-over Proposal by nightwalker (Established Relationship/1.2k) 

Steve wants to go on a journey, Tony doesn't think it's a good time, and Bucky needs to beat some sense into both these idiots.

A Winter’s Ball by alliejowrites (Victorian AU/3.8K) 

Steve moves to London in search of a patron, so that he can finally devote himself to painting. He is not expecting everything he finds upon meeting Lord Stark. A fluffy little Victorian AU. One-shot.

What’s a fanfic by starksnack (AvAc/1K) 

Kamala introduces Tony and Steve to the world of fanfiction. There is a surprising amount of content about them being gay.

[nyx-aira]

ok ok what about Sharon x reader where they’re on the run after Sokovia accords and someone almost finds them and y/n gets injured so Sharon takes care of her? and gets really protective?

Agent my Agent

Requested by @jessromanoff

Summary: A stroll through the city ends up in a fight you're not sure you're able to win.

A/N: I finally finished your request, I kinda changed it a little bit but I hope you still like it

Tag list: @escapetodreamworld @midnight-lestrange @king-star @ynscrazylife @ineffablebean

TW: mention of injuries

You and Sharon had been on the run ever since she helped Cap out, stealing his shield and getting branded enemy of the state. You remember the night when she packed her things and wanted to leave but you promised her once you would never leave her alone so you came with her.

It wasn't easy, everyone was searching for you but you made it work, with the help of some of Sharon's old contacts and your rather unique skills you managed to get out of the country unharmed and into a safe haven: Madripoor.

A city without laws, true to it's old pirate values. It took some time to climb up the society ladder but after getting a good offer as a hustler Sharon made some good money and what could you say, Hightown really was the place to be.

"Sharon, I'm going out." You shouted through the apartment, letting your girlfriend know that you were leaving. She was a well known person and even though you lived in Hightown this was still Madripoor so you had to be careful where you went.

"Where to?" She asked as she stepped through the door, looking at a list with presumably new clients.

"I need to go for a walk, I need some fresh air." You said as you searched for your jacket. Even though it was usually pretty warm in Madripoor you always wore long sleeves because of your...ah...condition. You might have escaped the US government but you both knew there were people here who had a vendetta against both of you.

"Where is my damn jacket?" You muttered under your breath as you searched through the apartment, making a mess out of the living room.

"Kitchen." Sharon just said and pointed to a chair where lo and behold, there it was.

"Be careful." She whispered as she gave you a short kiss on the cheek and passed you your jacket.

"I will." You promised as you grabbed your keys and a dagger, after all this was Madripoor.

When you stepped out of the apartment you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. It was good to be outside again, to feel the wind brush across your face and to smell the ocean breeze. Of all the places you've been to the last years this was the first time you had been near the ocean in all those years. Deciding to stroll down to the docks you started walking, following the smell of the ocean and the sound of the waves.

As you finally arrived at your destination you couldn't help but smile as you saw the waves crash against the port, rocking the boats and luring you closer to the water's edge. Its been a while since you've been swimming but it wouldn't be a great idea to just jump into the water right now. That's why you were content with just walking around the port, ignoring the sailors and salesmen as you continued to stroll around. It was a nice day in Madripoor.

Meanwhile Sharon was back in your apartment, preparing the last contracts for another deal. She looked at the clock again. It's been only 30 minutes, she told herself. There couldn't go anything wrong with you going for a walk. She knew where you were going, you were armed and there was nothing to worry about. You were fine. That's what she told herself but that didn't stop her from looking at the clock every ten minutes and the bad feeling in her stomach growing as time moved on.

You had found a more secluded area of the port and had climbed onto a big crate to have a better view of the ocean. It was relaxing, watching the ships come and go. It was getting pretty warm out in the sun, no shadows to hide in, you were sitting directly in the sun and the breeze didn't really help much. After making sure there was no one around you got rid of your jacket, glad that you made the decision the minute the air hit your skin.

You had been dozing off in the sun when you heard a crash and shot up from where you were laying, getting down immediately when you saw at least six men combing through the area, all armed to the teeth. Cursing under your breath you jumped down from the crate, careful not to make a sound as you landed on the hard concrete. You just wanted to grab your dagger when you realised it was in your jacket. And your jacket was on top of the crate.

Letting out a string of curse words you pressed your back against the crate and prayed that they wouldn't find you. The odds weren't in your favour after all.

Sharon was getting nervous, it had been an hour and even though she knew you could take care of yourself she also knew when to trust her gut. And right now it screamed at her to find you.

"Shit, shit, shit." You muttered as you slid behind a container to take cover, you had been shot and not just once. Lucky for you this didn't mean you would die immediately but if you didn't get out of there soon even you would die from a bullet to the chest.

Groaning you got up from where you were hiding and prepared to run when you looked at your arms. They were almost completely white now, the colour reaching past your elbows and reminding you that there was no hiding like this anymore. Making a decision you hoped it was the right one.

You stepped out in the open and immediately six guns were aimed at you as the bounty hunters stepped out of the shadows. You looked them up and down, searching for some wounds or weaknesses, and luckily for you you found some. Twisting your palms you got rid of the bullet in your thigh, transferring the injury to the man closest to you. Judging by his screams you had chosen the right one as he fell down. An sport injury in his knee was another ones downfall as it gave you the opportunity to loose the stab wound in your knee and bring him down as well. That's how you continued to fight them, turning the injuries and pain they gave you into their own. Sometimes being cursed had its advantages.

You got rid of the last bounty hunter the same moment you heard a bang, then everything went black.

Sharon ran faster when she heard the explosion, cursing herself that she didn't change her outfit from before. When she rounded the corner she saw six dead men under the rubble but no sign of you. Scared as she couldn't find you she was just about to call for help when she saw someone move under the remaining container. Running over to you she carefully pulled you out from the rubble only to find you covered in burns and scratches. Horrified from what she saw she let out a sob and cradled you closer to her chest as the tears ran down her face, falling onto your injured skin.

Sharon opened her eyes when she saw a glow emitting from your body, your injuries healing in the places her tears hit your skin. The realisation hitting her she hoisted you up on her shoulder and walked to the water's edge. Careful not to hurt you any further she gently got into the water, holding onto your body and praying that it would work.

Soon enough your injuries started to heal and the burns disappeared. You woke soon after, sputtering water as you almost chocked to death, startled to wake up not on land.

You looked around to see Sharon next to you, a relieved smile on her face as she pulled you closer.

"I'm so glad you're okay."

You smiled at her and pulled her closer.

"A curse does have its advantages sometimes."

"Yes it definitely does." She agreed as she pulled you in for a passionate kiss. You smiled into it as you realised she had chase you down in her black dress and heals, make up now completely ruined as she had jumped into the water to save you from your injuries. Breaking the kiss you smiled at her.

"Agent my Agent." You said looking at her with a mischievous glint in your eyes. "You saved me."

"Shut up." She muttered as she dragged you into another kiss. She was glad that you were okay because she honestly wouldn't know what to do without you.

[bruhstories]

Vogel und Jäger

- PART TWO

Summary: After waking up, you realise the realities of the world you've been pulled into. Pairing: Zeke Jaeger x Fem!Reader (mafia AU) Warnings & Content: stabbing, language, angst Word Count: 1.7 k

A/N: make sure to read part one, otherwise this won't make any sense xD there's still a bit of build up going on, but starting with part three we'll be getting some action

You woke up from a restless sleep, crumbs of mascara stuck to your face. God, you needed a shower and a toilet immediately. The club was dead empty from the view upstairs, only a few people cleaning the tables and moping the floor. You stretched your arms and walked to the door, surprised it wasn't locked.

"Ah, miss Y/L/N, good morning! I hope you had a pleasant sleep." Someone startled you and you cleared your voice.

"Hi, who are you?"

"Oh, my apologies, I am Onyankopon." The man smiled and handed you a paper bag. You peekee inside and saw something which resembled clothes and toiletries. You recognised the stag pin in his chest, another of Zeke's employees. "I assume you'd like to clean yourself up. Please follow me."

"I'd love that, thank you." You smiled and followed Onyankopon downstairs. He told you bits and pieces of the Jaeger family overthrowing the police and gaining control of Paradis City, how the Marleyans wanted control over the city's resources and docks, all kinds of information you weren't entirely sure you were supposed to know. He walked you to the backstage, where all the strippersdancers got ready, encouraging you to use whatever you needed for you'd be the star of the club. That didn't help you in any way, instead it was anxiety-inducing, and your toes curled at his affirmation. You quickly took off last night's makeup, brushed your teeth, washed your face and body in a sink and got dressed. The clothes were simple, a long, light blue shirt — clearly a man's — and a pair of leggings. You wondered whom they belonged to, perhaps that grim-looking lady, Yelena. She terrified you with her look that could kill. Your hands hovered over the vanity in the dressing room but decided not to waste any more time and folded your old clothes, placing them in the paper bag.

"I'm ready." You walked out of the room and met with Onyankopon. He smiled and guided you out through the back door. "Hey, Onyankopon, who's Mikasa?"

"Oh, miss Mikasa is our best assassin. She's loyal only to Eren, though, which is an impediment for Zeke... I probably shouldn't have said that." He opened the door of a superb black car and you climbed inside with a sigh. You heard how the mafia was based on trust, and no one trusted you.

Most of the ride was silent, your eyes wandering out the window until Onyankopon parked in front of a huge and heavily guarded mansion. You knew the Jaegers were rich, but this was beyond obscene. You opened the door and Onyankopon scolded you for doing that, but you assured him you were perfectly capable of doing things by yourself. He walked you through the beautiful front garden of the mansion, through the large hallway and into what you assumed to be a living room. Or an office? Whatever that was, it was as big as the dining room of the orphanage.

"Ah, the little bird has arrived! You look splendid in my shirt." Zeke welcomed you and you felt your cheeks warm up at his words. The heat disappeared just as quickly when your eyes met with Yelena's. "Come, sit. I suppose you're hungry."

You nodded, feeling saliva building up in your mouth at the sight of croissants, bagels and all kinds of foods you've never had before. Historia was rich, but even her money wasn't enough to feed so many mouths. Doors swung open and you saw Eren barge in, followed by a few people close behind. He plopped on a couch opposite you, the same inexpensive look on his face.

"Let's get over with this. I've got shit to do."

"Impatient as always." Zeke rolled his eyes. "Y/N, do you swear to obey and serve the Jaeger family?" The question caught you off guard, but you nodded.

"I do."

"There, done." The older Jaeger brother shrugged and Eren clicked his tongue.

"You almost didn't let Mikasa walk out of this room alive because she swore loyalty to me and this is all you do to her? You're getting soft, brother."

The air in the room grew thick, almost impossible to breathe it in. All eyes were on you, and you didn't know if what you felt was shame or fear, or both.

"Very well." Zeke walked behind you and took your left hand, placing it on the coffee table in front of the couch. "Hold that there, will you, love?" He smiled and you slightly relaxed. Until — a sharp pain, followed by electricity and heat shot from your hand, through your arm. A blood-curling scream erupted from your throat, tears falling from the corners of your eyes as you squirmed and thrashed at burning sensation, your hanned pinned to the table with a knife. Blood seeped from the wound and you panicked, no one in that room rushing to your aid. No one blinked, no one felt sorry. "Swear your loyalty to me. To the Jaeger family."

"I swear! Oh, God, I s-swear! Please!" You begged, feeling your temperature falling from your cheeks. Zeke twisted the knife and you fell from the couch, knees hitting the wooden floor.

"Who do you belong to?" He asked, unphased by your whimpers, sobs and yelling, as he let go of the knife that still pierced your flesh.

"T-to you! Make it stop, p-please!"

"Good enough for me. Any objections?" Zeke eyed his little brother.

"Just stitch her hand. She's annoying." Eren clicked his tongue and poured himself a cup of coffee. When Onyankopon pulled the knife out, blood gushed out of the fresh wound and you felt the room spin and your head heavy, vision blurry — you fainted.

A hard slap across your cheek woke you up and you met with Yelena, eyes drifting to your bandaged hand. It was damn painful to move it, and you used your other hand to support your weight, shifting your position on the couch.

"Finally." Eren got up and and handed you a file. You flipped through it and found pictures and information of the men from the club.

"Y/N, this is Armin, our bookkeeper. He'll be paying you after every successful show. And this is Mikasa, she'll train you in self-defence. I suspect you won't need it, but it's better to be safe than sorry." Zeke pushed the glasses with his index finger.

"You stabbed me." You bluntly stated, eyes glued to the bandages.

"It'll heal."

"It'll heal? I'm already in debt, you didn't need to stab me!" You got up and instantly felt a gun to your head. Great.

"Sit." Yelena's voice was brash and commanding. Your brain told you to listen to her, but your instincts told you to provoke her, to taunt her. Teeth gritting, you took a deep breath and lowered yourself down, deciding to do both.

"You're not gonna shoot me without Mr. Jaeger's permission, so don't point your gun at me." A satisfied smirk creeped on your lips — you didn't technically provoke her, just stated the obvious.

"Can I shoot her?"

"No." Zeke enjoyed the show, and unbeknownst to you, he, too, felt somewhat proud of your little snarky remark. "You still have to prove your loyalty. Talk to the band, choose some songs for Friday, Saturday and Sunday. You're free to settle your training hours with Mikasa, and to go wherever you want, but you are not allowed to step foot anywhere outside the centre of Paradis. Last thing I need is some Marleyan kidnapping you and torturing you for information. Or the cops. Dismissed."

"Mr. Jaeger, if I may?" You waited for his nod of approval. "Since I won't be living at the orphanage anymore, where exactly am I going to stay?"

"Ah, yes, of course. Blouse, Springer, come here." Zeke waved his hand. More people, more names.

It slowly dawned to you that the Jaegers had a thorough structure with extremely loyal people, and you'd have to quickly find your place there and earn their trust, lest you died a painful death. A bubbly brown-eyed woman and a cheerful-looking man approached Zeke's desk, and finally you saw someone less serious. Onyankopon was nice and all, but he wasn't exactly a ray of sunshine. These two seemed... fun.

"These are Sasha Blouse and Connie Springer, leaders of the drug cartel. You'll stay with them until you're capable of living by yourself."

The duo smiled at you and you felt genuine warmth from them, making you wonder just how bad the mafia was. They seemed to like working for the Jaeger brothers, but you couldn't judge that just yet.

"Oh, we've already moved your stuff to their place, so there is no need for you to visit Historia. Now go, we've got work to do." Zeke placed a cigarette between his lips before turning his back at you.

You were right, Sasha and Connie were fun people. They talked a lot, and you warmed up to them with a few jokes and puns. Connie handed you a phone containing a few contacts, neither of which were Zeke or Eren— apparently you weren't allowed to speak to them, they would speak to you. Sasha explained how you had to forget your past, and dedicate yourself solely to the family — no relationships, no friends, no acquaintances. You were not permitted to fall in love, which was understandable, considering the circumstances, but hard, considering the inability to control feelings.

"Don't worry about it too much. Zeke and Eren care about their subordinates, as long as you listen." Connie wrapped an arm around your neck. Besides, you're one of the lucky ones. Boss never spares witnesses, so he clearly saw potential in you." Somehow, that didn't make you feel any better, you only felt more weight on your shoulders.

"Yeah, I heard you can sing!" Sasha beamed, clapping her hands. "I can't wait for your first show, I bet it'll be awesome."

"It has to be, otherwise you'll have to come to my funeral." You shook your head, exiting Jaeger Manor. A honk caught your attention and you saw Mikasa impatiently waiting for you in a car. "Any advice before I go?"

"Don't get attached to any of us." Connie sighed.

"But trust that the family will protect you if you're loyal." The woman encouraged you before hugging you. A hug, something you never thought you'd get from a mobster.

[boxofbadaddiction]

Come For a Drive

George Weasley x Reader

Summary: George steals his Dad's car to take the girl he fancies on a surprise late night drive but things don't go quite to plan.

Warnings: Swearing. Our boy don't have a liscene.

It was risky, George knew that. Stealing his Fathers car in the dead of night. If his parents found out he was sure he'd never see freedom again. But it was worth it, in his opinion. Y/n was worth it.

He's been smitten with her since the beginning of the year, after they shared a compartment on the Hogwarts Express.

He's always known of her, being mutual friends with Lee Jordan and all, but she's always been rather reserved. It wasn't until they shared that compartment he realised how great she was. There was just something different about her that hooked him.

He'd tried all year to get to know her better, but it wasn't easy. She had very thick walls built around herself, he could she that, but he also saw the goofy, confident, fun side of her too scratching just below the surface. If one wasn't paying attention it'd be easy to miss but George was always paying attention.

As the Summer holidays drew nearer he'd managed to get some fleeting moments alone with her: between classes and walking from meals. Which is how he learnt she lived only a cars ride away from the Burrow.

Hence his current escapade.

It was just past 11 o'clock in the night when he gingerly snuck from his bedroom as to not wake Fred (not that he would even if George tried to wake him) then down the stairs and out the back door.

Slowly he pulled the barn doors of their small shed open and crept into the car; a bronze, 1978 Volkswagen Scirocco.

His face scrunched as he turned the keys in the ignition as if willing the car to start as quietly as possible. With a rumble and hiss of the engine the car started. While he sat waiting for the engine to warm up he stared worriedly to the homes windows praying no lights flicker on.

A few minutes passed with no movement and he sighed in relief, shifting into reverse he backed the car out and set off with one destination in mind. Y/n's.

...After a breif detour as the low fuel light beckoned him to the nearest petrol station. Luckily the family kept a decent amount of muggle money in the console for such occasions. Arthur hadn't dared modify their new car with magic as he had the Ford Angila, given what unfolded 2 years prior.

Driving cautiously through the street he recognised as Y/n's his eyes scanned every house door and mailbox for the number he knew to be hers, from all the times they'd exchanged letters, smiling proudly to himself when he spotted it and the light which shone from her bedroom window which told him she was awake.

Y/n was a halfblood, like Lee Jordan, and after a discussion with George on some of her favourite classic movies the idea to surprise her in a similar fashion had sprung to mind.

Pulling the car to the side of the street he quickly shift into park, leaving the car running as he hopped from the vehicle, and crept to the garden which lined the base of the simple two story home.

He searched blindly on the ground for a handful of small stones, standing back a pace when he was satisfied with the 5 small rocks in his palm.

He could faintly hear the melody of whatever song she were playing through her speakers and hoped he'd be loud enough for her to hear.

Softly as possible he tossed them towards her window and listened for the light clink which followed telling him he'd hit his mark. The first 3 he threw were met with no response. It wasn't until his fourth attempt the approaching shadow of her figure told him he'd got her attention.

She peered curiously from the window of her bedroom, squinting into the darkness below.

George stepped into the light thrown from her bedroom, waving an arm above his head to get her attention onto him which seemed to do the trick as she opened the sliding glass window.

"George?" She questioned in a shouting whisper. "Hey" he answered simply with a smile.

"What are you doing here?"

"Come for a drive"

Y/n was silent for a moment as her brows furrowed and mouth fell agape. "...what?" "Come for a drive." He repeated casually. "You don't have a liscene." "No, but I have a car...don't worry I'm an excellent driver" he winked.

The girl looked back over her shoulder into her bedroom then back to him, contemplating the idea and biting her lip at the thought. Her mind telling her one thing while her heart begged for another.

"Okay. I'll be down in 2 minutes" she allowed a smile to breakthrough onto her features. George's eyes lit up at that and he began nodding through a grin as he moved toward the car, "Dash of speed" he teased hoping back into the drivers seat.

Y/n rushed quietly through her room, throwing on a favourite pair of jeans and comfortable sweatshirt, overtop of the plain singlet she were already wearing, before switching off her stereo and bedroom light.

Cautiously she made her way down the stairs from the top floor of her home desperate not to wake her sleeping Father down the hall. Grabbing a set of house keys from the hook by the door she rushed from the house and made a run for the passenger side door. She chuckled slightly as she slid into her seat, looking excitedly to George as she fastened her belt. He was lent back in his place with one hand on the steering wheel and the other rested comfortably on the back of the passenger-side headrest. "Ready?" He questioned. "Ready."

It were a relatively short drive, mere 25 minutes from her home, before they found themselves admiring the large wheat fields and empty farm paddocks highlighted by the bright fullmoon shining over head.

Little to Y/n's knowledge this spontaneous late night drive was more than it appeared. George had spent a short amount of time that afternoon setting up a small picnic basket in the shed with a few small candles and a large blanket which he planned to spread out by the Burrows pond. He was hoping tonight would be the night he and y/n could become something more than just good friends.

They'd been making comfortable conversation all the while as George drove them down the familiar old dirt road which led directly to his home, his heart was swelling with pride at the smile on her face and the knowledge he were the one who put it there. The night was absolutely perfect...

Until the engine gave a sudden unexpected cough and shudder and dread flooded his body.

The pair looked worriedly to the bonet through the windshield. George swallowed harshly before speaking "old cars ya know...nothing to worry about." Y/n looked to him with a tight-lipped smile and an uncertain nod.

Georges hands came to grip tightly at the wheel as he silently prayed and begged for the car to just. make it. home.

Another engine sputter rocked the car and they began to lose speed.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." George muttered anxiously under his breath. "Not now." The car gave a final harsh lurch before stopping in it's tracks on the old dirt road.

"Sure it's nothing." George reassured.

A reassurance which did not hold well as the engine let out a hiss and steam began billowing from the bonets edges.

The Redhead had to admit defeat. With a deep sigh he spoke simply: "Fuck." And pushed himself back into his seat, furrowing his hand through his hair.

Y/n swiftly unbuckled her seatbelt and sat up straight, tying her hair back out of her face.

"Look, I'm really sorry " George turned in place to face her sensing he'd just completely ruined the night. Several more apologies were already lined up on the tip of his tongue, "I-"

"Pop the hood." "What?"

The girl reached over the boys lap, one hand bracing the wheel as her other felt for the bonets lever. George sucked in a surprised breath at their current rather compromising position and held his hands back by his shoulders. When two of her fingers locked under a latch she gave a tug listening for the light pop of the cars hood which followed. Sitting up quickly she swung herself from the car as she opened the door in one swift motion walking to the front.

George fumbled with his seat belt hurriedly as he stumbled from the car to join her watching as she hoisted the bonet and secured it in place.

He coughed as the cloud of steam hit his face but y/n seemed unphased. With two hands placed on the cars front she lent over inspecting the engine looking for anything that may be out of place.

George watched as she tore her shirt from over her shoulders and wrapped it over her hand to test the various knobs were secure in place. He felt a bit awkward as he had no idea what to be looking for, but given the way her eyes scanned the cars interior he trusted she knew what she was doing.

He hadn't meant to but his eyes soon left the the cars body and attached to hers as he admired the way she bent forward. The look of concentration on her face as well as the slight shimmer of her skin from the steam and heat radiating from the busted vehicle. "There's not a flaw to this woman." He thought to himself.

He'd gotten so lost admiring her curves he almost missed when she spoke to him.

"What fuel did you put in here? Diesel?"

"Hmm? I-Ah-" George stuttered and cleared his throat, "The one closest to the car."

Y/n takes a step back letting the hood loose from it's prop and closes it, dusting her hands together as she speaks, "This car takes unleaded, you've put in diesel. Your engines clogged."

"Can we fix it?" George asks hopefully with a nervous expression, he had no intention of his parents ever knowing about his late night drive...so this complicates things a bit. Y/n, meanwhile, has to fight back the urge to smile at how cute he looks when he's nervous.

"I'll need tools but yeah, I can."

"Ugh. This is crap! I can see the bloody house from here." The boy groans frustratedly staring down the road.

"Look on the brightside, the roads pretty flat from this point on."

The redheads face scrunches in confusion, "How is that a brightside?" "Makes the push that bit easier." Y/n claps him on the back as she walks to the drivers door.

"...the push!?" George exclaims in shock. He watches as she leans into the car throwing her shirt into the back seat and shifts the gears into neutral before cranking the windows handle to wind it all the way down. "Unfortunately so."

He looks from the oddly relaxed girl back to where he can faintly see his home in the distance. "That's gotta be over 2k's away..." he states the obvious. "Well, there's no point waiting around. If you push from the back I can lean through the drivers side window and use the wheel to steer while I push from here. Shouldn't be too bad." "You are weirdly calm right now." This comment causes the girl to let out a small laugh. "Yeah well, this wouldn't be my first time. Come on, best get to it."

To George's surprise it wasn't overly hard to push, it were no picnic of course and he were quickly becoming tired but he'd expected it to be much harder than it turned out to be.

The pair were working up quite a sweat as they pushed the car along the dirt track. They took a brief pause for George to take the time to remove his red flannel, leaving him in a sweat stained white t-shirt, and tied it's sleeves around his waist as he'd become far too hot from the work. Their hair was now sticking to their foreheads from the sweat, the sight of the Burrow so close now firing a new determination in them to make it back.

Y/n managed to easily guide the car back into it's place in the Weasleys garage as George collapsed comically behind the vehicle in a huff. "Ya know, when I came to get you tonight this wasn't at all in my plans."

"I'd certainly hope not." Y/n chuckled. George rest his head against the back of the car as he gazed over to where his prepared basket sat by the tools bench thinking if he may yet be able to recover from this rather embarrassing muck up.

"Right, do you have a tool box around here?"

"Ah, yeah" George shifts to grab their tools, laid just beside the basket he'd been staring at, thankful now of his Father's tinkering hobby as the shed was well supplied with a variety of tools he hadn't a clue what most were used for.

Y/n pulls the keys from the ignition before walking around to meet him as he hands the tools to her. "So, how do we do this?" "I'll need to drain your tank to start off, nothing I haven't done before." The girl speaks moving to place the tools by the boot, rummaging through the kit briefly in search of a flashlight: smiling as she locates a small black one in the bottom corner. She takes the keys and uses them to unlock the boot and retrieve the car jack, quickly pumping up the car so she can lay down underneath, switching on the small light as she does so.

"What are you doing down there?"

"Looking for the drain." "Ah! Right..." George is truly glad y/n can't see his face right now because the confusion he's visibly expressing gives away his feigned understanding of what she's talking about. He's quickly realising Muggle things are much more complicated than he may have thought.

"So uh...how do you know about all of this?" George questions awkwardly.

"My dad. He raised me, he's a mechanic and a real grease monkey. He taught me everything I know. Hey, do you have like a shallow bucket or grease pan out there?" "Uhh" he looks around the small room, filled with all of his fathers odd muggle artefacts and spare parts. "Yeah here you can use this." He answers reaching for a shallow tin dish.

Y/n slinks out from under the car after placing the bowl and unjacks the hoist letting the fuel drain.

"What's next after that's out?" "I'll clean everything out, put it all back together and no one need know a thing." She winks at the astonished boy infront of her.

"You truly are brilliant." He smiles.

George watches on as y/n works diligently to fix his Fathers car, completely in awe, as the night slowly approaces the day. She tells him about her childhood: growing up watching street races and helping her father fix cars. His eyes are trained to her every movement and attention fixed unwaveringly to every story she tells. She's so smart and beautiful and just everything he wants he can't help feeling himself falling further for her as he hangs from every word.

"Well. That should be it." Y/n smiles to George as she wipes her hands on an old rag, stepping away from the car.

She's covered in dust and grease and sweat but there's a glow to her. George can't stop the smile that breaks across his face as he takes her in.

Y/n's face drops slightly and she tilts her head in question at Georges endearing sort of stare held on her. "What?" This successfully snaps him out of his trance as he shakes his head answering quickly "oh nothing no I just- thank you. For everything you're...you're really amazing."

Y/n chews the inside of her bottom lip as she blushes from the compliment wringing the piece of cloth between her nervous palms. "You're getting soft on me, Georgie." The girl teases and throws the dirty rag at his chest which he catches easily, tossing it aside.

His eye's rake over her figure once more in admiration and he notices a dead blade of grass hanging from a stray lock of her hair. He moves towards her slowly so he's standing not inches from her, staring down to her questioning doe-like eyes and slightly pouted lips. With a tentative hand he pulls the piece from her hair flicking it to the ground before tucking the strand behind her ear.

"You're filthy." George speaks without thinking, to which Y/n raises an eyebrow. "Laying under a car will do that to a girl." She retorts. "Sorry, I just meant, you probably want to get cleaned up?" He elaborates taking a bashful step back.

"Oh, it's fine really. I wouldn't want to risk waking your family. I can just wait till later-" "if it makes you more comfortable, there's a small sink at the end of Dad's work bench, wager you'll feel loads better once all that dust and crap is off your that pretty face of yours." He swipes his thumb over the edge of her chin playfully as he speaks the last words to her, that signature mischievous glint replacing the nervous look in his eyes from earlier. Y/n blushes at his words and the light touch. "I'll go grab us some drinks, you must be thirsty after how hard you've worked. I'll be back in a tick, yeah?" With a quick wink he leaves for the house.

As George leaves Y/n takes a moment to express all the giddiness she's feeling over the night. A bright smile adorning her features as she bounces slightly on the balls of her feet releasing a content sigh. She is so happy she came out tonight, even with George's little mishap with refuelling the car, she wouldn't change a moment of it. She's fancied George for quite some time now but something in her always stops her from being fully open to the possibility he may like her too. After tonight though she's hopeful their relationship is growing into something more.

Snapping herself out of her little lovestruck daze with a shake of her head she makes her way over to the small basin and begins washing away the dust and grime clinging to her skin.

George moves quietly through the kitchen retrieving a few small snack items and cool drinks from the fridge, listening intently for any movement upstairs. He decides to freshen himself up at the sink as he's quite sweaty as well, covered in dirt from the long push home, splashing water over his face and lightly scrubbing his forearms clean. He chews his lip as he peers from the kitchen window to the shed thinking about the girl waiting for him inside. 'May just be able to save this night yet' he thinks.

He's about to leave out the back door when a thought crosses his mind which has him quickly dashing to the laundry for a clean set of shirts. Ripping his dirty shirt over his head and the flannel from around his waist to replace it with one that's clean. He grabs one of his jumpers while he's at it before dashing back out the door.

"Hey, Y/n?" He calls walking back into the garage and over to where she's drying herself by the sink with a hand towel. "I-uh, I grabbed this while I was inside. Thought you might like something to wear. It's not much, a bit scratchy and probably 4 sizes too big but it's clean at least." He smiles sheepishly handing over the light sweater and turning to leave to give her some privacy to change and hastily set up the small picnic he'd intended for them to be on.

Y/n is at a loss for words. Staring to the deep green sweater in her hands, she runs the soft material through her fingers as she notices the large blue 'G' on the front and can pretty much feel her breath being stolen from her. She's certain there'd be no wiping the giddy, schoolgirl smile from her lips no matter how hard she tried.

Changing into the jumper quickly she relishes in the familiar scent of the man who gave it to her as it fills her senses. Nuzzling her face into it's collar she draws in as much of him as she can in a single breath before moving out to find him.

Her brows furrow as she notices his absence from the garage, stepping anxiously from the small building "...George?" her voice calls for him tentatively. She's startled as his tall figure suddenly appears by her side, there's a wide smile on his face and he's slightly out of breath.

"Hey" he greets as he grabs her hand, "Come with me." Y/n stumbles behind as he pulls her along with him, feeling butterflies erupt in her stomach over how his hand grips her own.

"This..." George begins as he comes to a stop pulling her body close to his, "is what I actually had planned for us tonight." He guestures towards a plaid blanket laid out by a ponds edge. 3 tealight candles lighting a platter of various snack foods and drinks. Billions of stars glimmer over head as the moon casts a brilliant blue over the vast paddocks which line the horizon.

Y/n's in awe of the scene laid before her and can't seem to find the words to express how blown away she is. George pulls her towards the picnic slowly as he watches a smile form onto her lips as she looks up to him.

"George, you didn't have to-" "i know I didn't have to. But I wanted to. I wanted to do this for you."

The pair sit and George takes the lead serving her a cool drink and some of his favourite pastries and sweets. Conversation flows easily between them as the night goes on and sooner than expected the platter is empty and placed to their side as they admire the night sky in comfortable silence.

One by one the stars begin to fade as the dawns first rays peak above the skyline but neither of them have grown tired, too wrapped in this moment shared together to ever dare let fatigue in.

George has always adored sunrises at the Burrow, watching as the early morning rays bathe the vast fields in a golden glow, he's excited y/n will be able to experience her first with him.

This sunrise, however, is different. This sunrise feels like a warning for George, one which tells him he's quickly running out of time.

In a moment of confidence George shifts so he's closer to the girl he adores. Their hands over lapping and legs only just grazing the others as they stargaze. Feeling brave herself Y/n let's her head rest against his shoulder and she smiles as she feels his own rest atop of hers. Her eyes drift shut contently.

It's only a small moment of intimacy but it has their hearts racing.

"Y/n...can I tell you something?" George speaks, breaking the formed silence.

"Mmm, of course."

"I don't want to make this awkward so no matter what I say just know nothing has to change between us if you're not comfortable with this."

Y/n shifts slightly to look up at him as he draws a shakey breath. Their eyes meet and she notes the nervousness held in his expression, she offers a small nod of encouragement, urging him to continue.

George turns in place, shifting onto his knees, to speak with her. It's now or never.

"I just- this past year, getting to know you better, it's made me realise how alike we are. You've become one of my absolute best friends and I never for the the world want that to change. But I can't continue to deny the fact that I am completely taken by you. You're so strong and smart, funny and beautiful that I just- I've fallen for you. I'd really like to try and be something more...if you'll let me. If that's something you want too."

There it was. The confession Y/n has been dreaming of for months. The same one she'd been debating on sharing seconds before he spoke. Over the last year George has proved himself to be a most loyal friend and someone she can place all her trust in. Staring into his eyes now after such an amazing night the only thing stopping her from getting everything her heart desires...is knowing the right words to say.

"George, I-"

"Wait! You should know that even if you don't feel the same way that that's okay. I'll happily pretend this whole dopey speech didn't just happen so nothing has to change. I just want you to be...happy, with us. No matter what."

"I am happy, Georgie." She smiles reaching for one of his hands and intertwining it with her own. "But I'd be happier with you. You're my best mate...always will be. But everything you just said: I feel the exact same way. George, I want to be yours."

An astonished breath leaves his body at her declaration and he can feel his body relax as the nerves drain away. He could swear his smile has never been so bright as it is in this moment and all he wants to do is hold her.

His hands come quickly to cup the sides of her face, her hands resting atop of his forearms, as he leans in to kiss her, stopping himself moments before their lips connect.

He pulls back slightly peering into her eyes to ask, "Can-can I kiss you?" Y/n bites the inside of her lip as she smiles, nodding eagerly. Her hand comes to the back of his neck pulling their lips into one anothers in a soft kiss.

One of George's hands comes to her waist as the other rests below her ear and he smiles when he feels her pull him down so he's laying above her.

They kiss until their breathless and on still. Basking in the others presence and the feel of their body so close to their own. As the sun slowly breaks over the horizon painting the sky in hues of gold and crimson they fall beside each other, cuddled on the ragged blanket with their foreheads rested together. Perfectly happy.

"Stay for breakfast?" George whispers sweetly, "Reckon Mum won't mind an unexpected guest at the table. Not after I announce it's my new Girlfriend."

"Mm, and how do you plan to explain my sudden appearance?" George shrugs with a smile, pulling her back in for another tender kiss.

"I'll come up with something."

[papakhan]

I can honestly see why Jessie would want the NCR to wipe the fiends out, because when you get right down to it, there’s a pretty huge difference between the Khans and the Fiends: the Khans are traditional in the way that they’ve kept up what made them The Great Khans (I.e their toughness, their raiding parties, Papa, etc.) while the fiends are just monsters.

Like, the one Khan who did the most fucked up thing was Oscar and honestly you can see things from his perspective of being riddled with PTSD and anger and not being able to let go having been separated from the tribe for so long, and you can even talk him down from it and convince him that it’s time to head home.

The fiends have Cook-Cook. I rest my case.

I'm assuming this is about this post? Which yeah, I get that, I didn't mean that it was a negative part of Jessup's character or like a "plot hole" or anything that he wants the Fiends gone, I just thought it was an interesting look into his own opinions conflicting with the Khan's alliances and yknow everything that's happened to them. I also love to see Jessup being called Jessie :')

Personally I'd give the Khans a lot more credit then that. They've got traditions, crafts, education, families, as well as their reputation for being tough and mean but completely reasonable. And Oscar harkening back to the New Khan days as almost like a trauma response is interesting on it's own.

But yeah Jessup hating the Fiends because they're so distruptive and violent and he's so family oritentated is pretty interesting. He's got a little spice it's fun! Even Diane puts aside how she feels about the Fiends because "Papa likes them attacking the NCR" but not Jessup! I can imagine a lot of Khans thinking that the way the Fiends act is dishonourable and stuff anyway since Jessup and McMurphy don't even rob the courier of their caps or weapons. It makes me think that Khans don't approve of rifling through a dead person's pockets--which the Fiends and courier do

That being said I do think the Fiends could have More to them. I'm really not a fan of the way drug addicts are handled in new vegas in general and the Fiends being a mob of ~violent drug addicts~ to shoot at isn't great either. I prefer the interpretation of them being "disinfrancised people reacting poorly to the situtation they've been put in" though I'm not sure who came up with that.

I have a few mods installed and yesterday two of them came together quite nicely where I watched a group of Fiends and a group of Khans patrolling the same route together, and then rushing a group of Vipers together. I couldn't get too close because the Fiends were still hostile to me but it was kinda nice to see and I think the Khan/Fiends relations could really be worked on.

Like. idk Fiends who realise "ah shit these are real bad people I need to get the fuck out of here" but not being able to get close to Westside because of their clothes being able to slip out into the safety of the Khans.

But yeah Cook-Cook is not allowed within 100 metres of Red Rock Canyon or he will be taken out by a Khan sniper like guarenteeted.

tldr: i think theres a scale of Fiends from like the Just Kinda Rowdy And Using Violence To Cope to the Actually Vile People Up Top. I don't think Papa respects the Fiends "leaders" enough to even accept visits to his home from them and most Khans interact with either Motor-Runner or one offs on the outskirts like Razz

[caprina-mints]

Could we maybe get a scenario where EJ is in heat and doing the dirty with his s/o if that’s fine ówò

So This Became a Oneshot Because I accidentally made it a bit too Long! But I Hope everyone Enjoys This Though! : )

Type : SMUT

Word Count : 4208

E.J's HEAT

As Usual it's like any other Day at the Mansion being part of this bizarre family is really one heck of a ride. You never know what could happen like anything could happen. Anything.

You're fresh meat. You just joined the family two months ago and getting used to everyone and their behavior was a real pain in the ass.

But surprisingly you clicked well with Toby and E.J the two both have a unique and striking personality but the one that intrigued you the most was Jack.

He gives off a cold and mysterious vibe and you just can't help but to have your curious eyes gleaming at him. You two got along well and he told you a little bit of everything when it came to the human anatomy.

He's a bit over protective of you maybe it's because he sees you as a trusted friend? Well during those 2 months You and Him became a little Mushy together and a week earlier he has been acting extremely weird.

Like, He'd growl if another male creep came near you or even talked to you. He's around you all the time and the only place you're actually alone is your bedroom.

He kept tugging and nudging you just to get his attention and whenever you give him any form of physical touch he'd purr and lean onto you .

He's become very clingy and from the looks of it. It wasn't good judging from the looks the creeps were giving you.

They knew something You don't. Today you were sent on a Job which is unusual because you never get sent out alone but you are now.

Fortunately the Job was easier than expected so you went back to the mansion early.

You barely even touched the door and a Body was sent flying out knocking you along with it.

Groaning you sat back to see who it was and it was none other than the resident smile kid, Jeff.

" What the fuck? " You groaned standing up and brushing your clothes off of the remaining dirt.

" Y/n!... You're fucking back!? " Jeff sounded nervous and bothered seeing you and his expression and tone made it so obvious it offended you.

" Yeah? What's wrong with it? You think I'd never come back because of a tiny Job? " You threw a sharp glare his way and he didn't seem to give a reaction to your attempt on intimidating him .

" You gotta go. Now! ASAP! " Jeff tried shoving you back into the forest and you were dragged on the way.

" Hey! Let me go! What gives!? " You grumbled trying to pry his hand away from your wrist.

But your action was cut short when you heard a loud Yell which sounded more like an animalistic Growl come from inside the mansion.

" What the fuck? What's going on Jeff?! " You asked in panic and at the corner of your eye you could see Jeff Visibly Swallow.

It was definitely serious.

" Did you guys summon a Demon or something!? To get revenge on slenderman? " You jumped to your own assumptions because if he isn't giving you an answer you're going to make your own assumptions .

" No why on earth would we do that? Ok I would! But our Demon Boy is Going In Heat which means He's basically A Cageless Feral Beast on the Loose! " Jeff explained as he continued to drag you deeper into the forest but his pace had increasing by every passing second.

" What does it have to do with me!? " You yelled looking back at the doors of the mansion which were now pounding violently.

" Are you Dumb? Isn't it obvious? He's a demon. He's in heat. If Demons are in Heat they look for a Mate to Fuck and You're unfortunate enough to Have E.J see you as a potential Mate " Jeff explained and you were actually quite shocked by his statement... That's the most well executed Explanation you heard him say.

" Wow.. You sounded kinda uh... Less stupid when you said that " You commented which earned a groan of annoyance from the bleached Smile Child.

You two didn't manage to get far when the doors burst open and you could see. A Black figure heading your way at full speed and following behind that figure were Masky, hoodie, Toby, Ben , Helen and Even Puppeteer Seemed to be involved with the chase.

" Run! They couldn't Hold Him much Longer! " Ben yelled coming out from the mansion and Immediately You Bolted off with Jeff at Full speed never looking back.

You were actually terrified ... 1. if you stay You get Fucked By E.J who you have a hidden feeling for which is... Uh.. Kinda Great? But... 2. I heard Demons Eat their Partners After Sex and you definitely don't want to end up dead. It must be a fact because the one who told you about that was a demon... Jack himself.

" Mate! " You heard a rough growl from behind you his voice Echoing through the woods and when you looked back to take a peek boy were you scared shitless.

He was running on all fours his mask off and his teeth razor sharp, his claws extended and looked extra deadly and he has this domineering aura with him that made every cell of your body shout RUN. Behind him were the rest of the Boys Following Behind and even Puppeteer's strings couldn't hold him.

" Shit He's Catching up! " Jeff yelled and you couldn't help but give off a snarky comment.

" Ya Think!? " You snapped , Your feet were getting tired from running because you just got back from a fucking Mission. You didn't expect to be served a full course of Bullshit when you got back.

" Y/n! " Oh Lord the way he growled out your name made your knees weak and you stumbled on a rock but lucky for you Jeff wasn't being a prick and he pulled your weight back up while running .

" Don't Touch Her! " E.J's threatening Snarl was heard from behind and his Voice changed to something more vicious and ruthless.

" Jack! Stop Chasing Us! " You Cried out because your legs couldn't Take it Anymore, You were panting, sweaty and most of all Traumatized.

You once lived as a normal human who knows nothing about Demons and This World of killers. You were just dragged in unexpectedly and you can't take everything in one go! .

" Then Stop Fucking running from me! " You didn't expect him to reply and you felt relief wash over you.

" So you'll stop chasing us if we stop running? You'll Leave us alone? " You asked making sure you and him are on the same page.

You heard a loud audible growl before you heard his answer.

" Yes " It sounded forced judging by his tone and you were skeptical at first but Jeff had other plans and saw right through His.

" Don't listen to Him! I've lived with Him longer and obviously He's Lying! " Jeff stated and his words made the angry demon boy growl at Jeff, as if he was warning Him.

" Jeff. Don't Fucking Test Me! " He barked and that was enough to silence both of us.

" I can't take it anymore. Jeff even though you're an asshole you're gonna have to live on " You panted and Jeff Flashed you a questioning Look. You didn't bother to reply because it's time to face your fears.

You stopped on your tracks as you turned around Closing your eyes expecting the worst .

You felt sharp claws tug on your hips and your back was slammed on a nearby tree.

You heard growling , the type of growl a prey gives to a little bunny... Yeah it was that scary.

You forced your eyes to peek a look and you saw E.J's figure towering over yours baring his sharp teeth and his claws dug deeper on your flesh making you whimper.

" Why'd you run!? Especially with another man! You like others touching you Huh!?" He spat out angrily his face dangerously close to yours. He was using the same tone earlier and it made you weak.

" Why'd you chase us!? Of course it's a common instinct to run if you see something chasing you... Ready to eat you" You murmured the last part but E.J heard it loud and clear.

" I just wanted to be close to You But you ran away... You don't want to be with me that much? " He whimpered almost like a small dog who was abandoned by his owner.

He nuzzled his face on the crook of your neck your sweet smell intoxicating him but he knew he had to control himself.

His claws were no longer as sharp as they were before and you could hear him purring while rubbing himself on your form.

" Guilt Tripping me is a really old move E.J " You chuckled trying to pry him off you but he whined holding onto you even tighter.

Oh what the hell I'm going with it.

You placed your hand gently on his head petting his locks of brown hair, he started purring and leaned on your touch his hands going lower but the two of you were interrupted.

" Y/n! Get away from Him! " You heard the familiar voice of Jeff and this time Masky, hoodie and the rest were here.

You didn't get to react because Jack pulled you in his arms growling at the other males. Baring his teeth and almost hissing at them Jack took a few steps back with you.

" Stick your noses to your own fucking business! "

" Jack! She may be a potential mate but we can't have you fucking someone in the mansion just because of your heat. You may not even feel anything for-"

" She is MY mate, she is Mine to Keep and Mine to Love. I don't need your opinion to tell me what to Do! She'll be mine forever and I'll stay true to my words now fuck off! " Jack Snarled glaring at everyone else . The boys seemed to be communicating in a telepathic way because they just exchanged a few looks to one another before finally leaving.

" Y/n...last call if you don't want to just say so we'll help you" Hoodie called out and when you gave the slightest reaction to his question Jack Started whining and whimpering almost like he was physically hurt.

" Uh... I'll be Fine " You answered and Hoodie nodded walking off.

" So- Ah! " You squealed when you were thrown over his shoulder.

" Jack! Wait where are we going? " You asked when he started walking the opposite direction of where hoodie and the rest were heading.

".... I have a cottage around here whenever I'm having my heat... " He answered in a hushed tone .

You looked back at his features and you noticed how he kept realising puffs of breaths, His Face was oddly a different shade that usual and his hands were really fidgety.

" Jack if I'm heavy you can put me dow-"

" And let you run away again? you're not doing that you little Brat. Running away like that with another man. Oh you like teasing me don't you? " His tone was deep and taunting and you could feel his hand crawling its way up your ass.

You felt him squeeze your butt cheek making you gasp and groan when he smacked your ass.

" Jack stop! " You grumbled bit he didn't take that lightly.

" Oh? Resisting me too? " His hand trailed lower down to your pussy rubbing your pussy through the thin fabric of your leggings.

You bit back a moan closing your eyes , he didn't like it and started rubbing you at a rougher pace.

He didn't stop while maneuvering his way through the thick forest and by the time you two arrived at a small cottage you were soaked.

You survived that part by swallowing your voice and it seemed to have thrilled him even more taking it as a challenge.

Opening the door he closed it using his feet and immediately threw you on the couch were he towered over you glaring down at your form.

" Holding back your moans I see? You'll be screaming before you know it " He muttered his large hands gripping onto the fabric of your shirt and with ease he tore your shirt to shreds leaving you in your bra and the only piece of clothing you had now were your leggings.

Your heartbeat began to increase as you scooted away from him . He noticed that and grabbed your foot pulling you over in between his legs both of your legs spread and set on each of his sides and you could clearly feel his hardened cock from your position.

" Oops to Late to run away Now" He grinned using his claws to tear the fabric of your bra and before you knew it he attacked your lips in a hungry Kiss his hands groping your boobs, squeezing and pinching your nipples making you moan in the kiss.

He bit down on your lower lip just enough to tear the skin drawing out a small amount of blood before continuing down to your neck and collar bone his sharp teeth pricking your skin feeling him suck, kiss and nip your neck, your shoulder and collarbone.

You tried pushing him off but he had your hands under his grisly grip before licking and taking your cold buds in his warm mouth his tongue playing and swirling around your breast giving a subtle bite before sucking on your breast each Mounds having the same amount of attention and pleasure.

You arched your back moaning slowly giving into the pleasure he released your hands before shoving two of his fingers inside your mouth . You got the hint and welcomed his fingers inside your mouth sucking and coating his fingers with your saliva while continuing his unfinished worked with your breast.

After awhile he pulled his fingers away and faster than you could say 'I' your leggings along with your soaked panties were ripped and thrown to the floor gasping when the cold air hit your glistening pussy and the very same fingers you sucked on earlier came rubbing on your clit earning a loud shaky moan to tear away from your throat.

He looked so smug seeing how wet you were and he didn't waste another second and placed both of your legs on his shoulders his face dangerously close to your heated flower .

" J-jack Wa- Ahh~" You couldn't stop him when his long Black tongue came lapping on your juices.

His tongue draped over your pussy in a slow and agonizing way making you whine and glare up at him with heavy lidded eyes.

He chuckled at your needy state before his teeth came in contact with your inner thighs biting down on your flesh making you flinch and squeak.

He left a noticeable bite mark on your inner thighs before his teeth grazed on your other thigh doing the same thing while your slick covered pussy was needy for his attention.

" Jack please " You whined biting your bottom lip and hearing you plead for him to give you more aroused him further.

His tongue sneakily slid past your folds and into your squelching pussy , your moans shaky and desperate your hands flailed around to find something to hold on and subconsciously you held onto his brown messy locks raking your fingers through his hair as his tongue went in and out of your fleshy walls and your walls wet and needy welcomed him desperately sucking his tongue in.

You could feel him so deep inside of you it made you squirm and cry out his name in pleasure.

How long is his tongue!?.

Your hips bucked and rocked while he ate you out his tongue playing freely inside you but that was when another tongue rolled out of his mouth and another one.

" Oh shit Jack! " You screamed when he inserted another one while the shorter one lapped on your clit and teased your folds.

Your core lit up when both of his tongues came wiggling inside your walls only making your walls clench tightly around his tongues and when a bubbly and hot sensation built up inside you and was ready to release he pulled back his chin and mouth covered by your juices and slowly dropped down on his chest. He stared at you with a lascivious grin when you grumbles and whine for him to finish what he started.

" You were resisting and running away from me earlier... Look at you now... So wet and Needy for me... What do you want mate? " He purred as he pulled down his pants along with his boxers revealing his thick veiny cock which was bigger than you expected.

How's that supposed to fit?

As if he read your expression he gave you an answer.

" Oh it's gonna fit. I'll make sure you're taking every inch of me for making me go through all that trouble chasing you around like a mad Dog" He growled his figure growing bigger , his ears began to grow longer as well as his claws . Now you know that this is the demon Jack had been hiding.

" Answer me! " He spat at you his hand snaking to your throat slightly choking you and damn hell it sure did turn you on.

" Your Cock... Fuck me till I can't walk anymore " You choked out and that was enough for him to ram his whole length in not even going gentle at first. He didn't give you time to adjust because technically this isn't Jack anymore. He slid inside easily because of how wet you were to begin with .

" Oh- Shit Jack! " You couldn't even finish your sentence because you were choked up in your own moans.

He was going so fast, You felt his Knot and the very shape of his Cock mold inside your pussy. He hit the deepest part of you with every fast and rough thrust.

His speed was in human and it felt so good you almost forgot how to breathe being choked up and at the same time being a moaning mess from his roughness.

You heard his gruff groans and pants not even holding back a loud snarl he placed both of his hand right next to your head trying to steady himself as he pounded is inside you mercilessly and everytime he pumped himself in, your walls would gladly squeeze the life out of him.

An animalistic growl escaped his lips as he gritted his teeth, his claws digging and ripping into the cushion of the furniture and you heard something crack. Was it the couch or the wooden floor.

Tears began to pool at the corner of your eyes holding onto his neck for dear life your legs tightly wrapped around his torso , you couldn't keep up with how rough he is you began to feel dizzy.

Every time he snapped his back and rammed himself in he could reach the deepest depths he could .

Your toes curled arching your back while moaning in pleasure as you reached your high releasing your juices all over his cock. Your walls dangerously clenching his cock which led him to bite down on your shoulder finally releasing his thick seeds deep inside of you.

Panting while staying on that position he pulled himself out of your cum filled pussy that leaked out his seeds.

He sat back on the couch panting before his hand came down on his cock jerking himself while staring at you.

It didn't take him 5 seconds and he was already rock hard.

Oh wow.

He yanked you by your arm and you sunk down on your knees infront of him with his cock standing hard with all its glory.

This time he guided your hand on his shaft letting you stroke him.

Did he really think you're that innocent? Hah. Just watch.

At first your movements were shy and timid and you stuck your tongue out a little to give his tip a few kitten licks.

Looking down at you he saw such an adorable expression in your face. He didn't expect you to directly take his whole cock in your mouth in one go unexpectedly.

He was completely caught of guard his clawed hand pulled on your hair and a loud breathy moan was forced out of his throat staring at you with wide eyes.

" Fuck " He groaned out when you started bobbing your head up and down while occasionally pulling away with a pop before trailing your tongue from his base up to his tip.

The sight of you was really something he'd kill to see. Kneeling right there with an Innocent face while taking his cock like that. Shit he found it extremely hard to control himself around you.

It didn't help when you took him whole once again your hands going down to massage his balls while increasing your speed.

You were so pretty and so good with your tongue. He just had to have you right now and that's exactly what he did.

He stood up shoving your head down on the couch befire you felt him his cock enter you again .

Gasping in surprise you felt his clawed had dig into the skin of your hips and your pussy took him in so tight and so well it made the both of you moan in sync.

Shit how the fuck are you still this tight after he literally wrecked you earlier? .

He didn't much for awhile and it irritated you. You wanted him to fuck you already. You raised your hips but his grip on your flesh made it hard to do so.

" Fucking Move! " You groaned clutching onto the cushion of the couch.

" I'm fucking working on it you impatient little Mate" He pulled back only to push himself back in again.

It made you moan and shudder your knees shaking and your hands trembling as you held onto the seat of the couch when he started ramming himself in again and again .

Your pussy swallowing his cock deep inside you every time he did so. You sucked him inside your walls so well he was so close to releasing again.

You cried out and loud pants and mewls filled the room because you were still so fucking sensitive and you were still being fucked by him at such an animalistic way.

You felt his weight in your hips and he started going even faster. You were practically drooling while moaning out his name.

Your mind felt so mushy and you were slowly seeing stars.

You started moving your hips to meet his thrusts and every time you did he kept hitting that one spot that could make you scream .

You cursed under your breath and felt your walls hugging his cock even tighter. He looked down on you seeing you at such a vulnerable state under his mercy was really something. A growl rumbling at the back of his throat. You were squeezing onto his cock like you were ready to milk him dry.

His thrusts became shallow but soon he sped up almost immediately catching his breath while you made a lot more sinful sounds underneath him.

After a few more thrusts the two of you came at the same time your cum mixed with his and you could feel it leaking out of your hole because of how much was inside. Panting while trying to keep yourself from fainting he stayed at that position for awhile before leaning down to trail soft kisses on your bare back.

" ... after my heat you are obligated to Date me. If you say otherwise... I have my ways to get you around-"

" Oh my God Jack I love you too ok? No need to go that far " You grumbled and from you position you heard his chuckle and another kiss was planted on your back.

" I'm glad you do Y/n "

" Oh and... You're not gonna eat me right? " You asked cautiously and he was quiet for a few seconds before he burst out laughing.

" You seriously believed what I said? I was just Joking Little Mate "

" Tsk... Fuck you Jack "

" Oh I see that you're ready for another round"

By the Time you two were finally done you were cum soaked and sticky, the two of you hopped in the shower but it led to something more again.

[bagadew]

The Great Ace Attorney Playthrough: The Adventure of the Unbreakable Speckled Band (Part 1)

Last Time: With a little help from Susato, the lady in pink, we discovered that Miss Brett poisoned Dr Wilson with Curare, a fast acting poison that’s only effective when introduced into the blood stream. In a last ditch attempt to avoid justice, Miss Brett destroyed the evidence right in front of the court, but fortunately my man Hosonaga was on hand with new evidence he’d taken from the crime scene, meaning that all we had to do was catch the thief of a rare golden coin, and tie Miss Brett up with her own words! At last I (Ryunosuke) was acquitted!

...only to find out in the lobby that Miss Brett has managed to privilege her way out of any consequences and was gone like smoke in the wind. (Also Kazuma used his sword in a way I found very hot, and I think I’ve accidentally doomed him to death or moral corruption.)

I’m 90% sure The Speckled Band is a Sherlock Holmes case, and I’m 49% sure it’s one of the ones I’ve read. I’m guessing this is where we’ll meet The Great Himbo Detective Herlock Sholmes then!

Well I guess that answers that then.

(And yes, I have read this one)

HERLOCK!

And he’s voiced by Professor Layton maybe???

Ooh, this seems like a Study in Scarlet, are we doing a Study in Scarlet guys?

Herlock has a magic gun!?!

Also I’m not digging this Japanese scripture and talk of it being penned by ‘the victim himself’. Kazuma what did I tell you about leaving my sight?

Wait... I could have sworn I just saw Hosonaga dressed as a sailor...

Oh balls, am I about to be accused of murder again?

Honestly I can’t take you anywhere Ryunosuke

Well Ryunosuke, you remember how you went to a lovely restaurant and got arrested for a murder you didn’t commit?

Well, it’s just like that but substitute restaurant for ship.

Also I’m not liking how little I’ve seen of Kazuma...

Ryunosuke we really need to have a talk about you just saying what people want to hear.

ITS FUCKING KAZUMA ISN’T IT?!

:(

Nononononononono

I knew this was coming, you knew this was coming, Ace Attorney law dictated it was coming as soon as it set Kazuma up as both my mentor and best friend.

But even so, I thought they were just empty threats! I didn’t think they’d actually follow through! Or that we might at least enjoy Herlock Sholmes ad his magic gun together first.

I realise I’m stalling here, but maybe if I just don’t click I’ll not have to see his body.

Sailor Man, I understand that you’re very upset, we all are, but I need you to understand that I’m grieving here.

The man I love took one look at the morally compromised shits I’m normally into and decided he’d rather die than join them! And yes I know I’m still stalling and not taking this as seriously as I should because I still don’t believe it!

See, me and Ryunosuke are on the same page!

I didn’t Susato, but the problem is that you and I have only just met and I’m not very convincing!

:(

Kazuma you legend! I refuse to believe you are dead until I see your corpse.

Now Ryunosuke’s all: I can’t believe they tossed your case around that much. I thought I was going to die.

And Kazuma’s telling me he’s just amazed I fitted inside his trunk in the first place.

Kazuma you can’t be gone! Who else will condescendingly tell me to go to France and ask rather than translate a French label for me?

Now Kazuma’s telling me (Ryunosuke) that I’m going to have to live in his cabin for the next 50 days.

Also we’ve got to keep this from Susato because we’re breaking the law and Kazuma doesn’t want us to take her down with us.

Lol, every day I get shoved into the wardrobe by an uncaring Kazuma!

Oh, that’s what the message said!

God knows what the steward thought Kazuma was keeping in his wardrobe though

:(

See Ryunosuke, this is why we think before we speak.

I don’t envy the real killer when Susato gets hold of them.

From what I can find out it’s a locked room mystery, and the cause of death is still undetermined, so I’m guessing something like poison then rather than an obvious thing, like being stabbed with his big sword.

On one hand, I really hope it wasn’t something like Curare, because I don’t want Kazuma to have gone out like that, but on the other hand poison would explain why the killer didn’t need to be in the room when he died and why Kazuma didn’t strike them down with said big sword.

Ok, so Kazuma, legend that he was, got up every day at the crack of dawn to do sword training. And Susato, who I’m begging to suspect is incredibly hardcore, go up before him so she could go and wait for him outside.

Now that’s interesting.

The two of them seem like they were pretty close, so there’s a good chance it’s just that she’s so familiar with Kazuma’s habits that she can tell the second something’s off, or it could be that there’s some other reason we need to work out.

If that’s correct that means Kazuma was killed in the small hours of the morning.

You know up ‘til now I’ve been assuming Ryunosuke was knocked out or something, and that’s why he was unconscious in the wardrobe, but now I’m starting to think he might have just been sleeping in there.

:((

Wait why’d Kazuma write in Russian?

Like I’d buy that he might know it, but I don’t buy that’s it’s what he’d write in in his finger moments.

Well that proves my innocence then, all we need to do is get some witnesses to verify the ‘go to France and ask’ moment from the last case

Oh ok, I didn’t manage to screenshot it, but it seems that I (Ryunosuke) didn’t put myself in the wardrobe. That’s very odd.

I can see a vent up there, so maybe someone gassed us and then got in while we were asleep and set up the crime scene.

Kazuma said I should come, next question

Ryunosuke, with some of the words that come out of your mouth I don’t think you should be throwing stones.

Love?

Apparently not.

This is going to be something ominous isn’t it...

I’m starting to feel like Kazuma knew he’d never see England.

Kazuma how many toes did you tread on?

Oh fucking hell!

You can’t die and be heading down a dark moral path, that’s not fair!

Yeah, I want to know that too.

Ah

So my poison/drugging theory seems to be holding up. Apparently Kazuma bought me something to eat, I climbed into the hiding wardrobe, and then it’s lights out from there.

Given that I didn’t wake up when Kazuma was killed I’m going to say that also back that theory up. Even if it was silent I feel like Ryunosuke would have woken up if someone was going round the cabin knocking ink bottles over and killing Kazuma.

No, don’t blame yourself Ryunosuke!

It’s my fault really, if I was going to  find Kazuma hot I should have made sure I could manifest inside my switch and protect him!

Ah, of course! Isn’t her dad a professor of pathology? And she seems like the sort of person who picks things up pretty quickly!

In other words, if this is a poisoning, she could be the perfect person to be partnered up with.

:(((

Susato is fully prepared to kick our ass if we try and leave, and as the woman who got up before Kazuma, I think we should listen to her.

:(((((

I say we team up as an investigative duo and catch this bastard!

Yeah!

SHE FUCKED US UP!!!

Susato didn’t come here to play! Especially when we might have killed Kazuma!

(Editors note: this isn’t a bad screenshot, Susato genuinely made Ryunosuke’s vision go blurry)

I know we need to investigate, but my god this woman’s got a fist to match her convictions.

You know when I first met Susato I was a bit afraid she was going to be the inverse of Maya to the point of being meek and shy.

Now I see what a fool I was.

Susato might be prepared to politely follow the rules, but woe betide you if you break them.

She’s even named it!

Again I know this is bad for us but GO SUSATO!

(God damn it you can’t all be my favourite characters)

Her own special martial arts form Ryunosuke!

And just like that she regathers her composure and carries on as if nothing had happened!

I like how she’s still just standing over me.

Ok Ryunosuke let’s go!

(Seriously though we don’t want her as an enemy)

Ah of course, Kazuma stuck the seal on the wardrobe, and the fact Herlock Sholmes (the himbo detective) had to pull it off means I didn’t leave!

No one respects poor Ryunosuke...

So it seems that Susato doesn’t believe we’re innocent just yet, but as we’ve presented the possibility of doubt before her she will let us investigate this room.

Given the buck wild nature of the last trial she was involved in, I honestly can’t blame her for not ruling this possibility out. After all if this was something a witness in a trial had said I’d be thinking the same thing.

Susato’s going to be watching us to make sure we don’t disturb the crime scene, which again is fair.

I’ve got to say, I’m really digging Susato’s cautiously suspicious and sensible nature. It feels like a good counterbalance to Ryunosuke’s beautiful but naïve outlook on life.

I bet if Susato had stowed away onboard a ship you wouldn’t catch her immediately confessing as soon as a sailor started to press her.

Who am I kidding, Susato would never have got into this situation in the first place.

*sob*

Ok so far we’ve got:

A) Half a pink kimono fastener on the floor next to a brick red mark

B) One disturbed table, with the remains of our roast chicken dinner on the floor

C) The terrible knowledge that Kazuma spent his last night on earth hungry because he didn’t like chicken

D) Kazuma’s precious katana, that he loved dearly and that he’d apparently managed to persuade the government to let him bring to the UK.

Oh yeah, drive the knife in why don’t you game!

Why do I feel like Ryunosuke’s about to get roasted?

There we go.

(It’s what Kazuma would have wanted)

DON’T JUST GO WITH IT RYUNOSUKE!

Back to investigating, we’ve got a ransacked shelf, and Kazuma’s London diary.

Just, you know, to rip my heart out...

It looks like the final entry’s incomplete, which means Kazuma was probably writing it when the incident happened. Unfortunately Susato is violently insistent that we respect the Kazuma’s private thoughts after his death, so we can’t read it.

We’ve got the inky Russian(?) on the floor which none of us can either recognize, nor read (including me)

(Sorry to any Russians reading this by the way, I can only assume you’re screaming that this isn’t Russian, but I’m just going by what the Great Himbo Detective said in the cut scene.)

Ok, so the sailor who’s been guarding us got very flustered when we asked if everything was normal last night, meaning that either he’s been skiving off, or everything was in fact not normal last night.

Oh sweet, it seems that Ryunosuke and Susato both read detective novels, and while we’ve shot down the possibility of using the needle and thread trick to unbolt the door from the outside (side note: I must remember to try that later), I feel like both they, and the player who immediately started trying to rattle off facts about Curare, have had a bonding moment.

Ok, I think that’s this half of the room done, let’s go and check out that vent I saw earlier.

So the vent connects to the room next door. That means if the grate could be moved we have a way in and out of our crime scene!

HERLOCK SHOLMES!!!

I mean, he’s quite hard to miss Ryunosuke

(I think Ryunosuke might have an Apollo complex short)

Understatement of the century

Her and me both Ryunosuke, it’s The Great Himbo Detective!!!

WE’RE TALKING TO HIM!

AND HE’S BLANKING US!!!

Herlock Sholmes I understand that you’re in a critical point of your investigation, but you need to understand that Ryunosuke, Susato and I are sad and need to see your magic gun.

YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSS!!!

IT’S LIKE HE HEARD ME!!!

OH GREAT HIMBO DETECTIVE CHEER ME WITH YOUR WITH YOUR ECCENTRIC ACTS THAT ARE RELATABLE TO MY AUTISTIC ASS!!!

OMFG HE’S SO INCREDIBLY WRONG!!!

I hope this is the way all of his deductions go from now on.

Also I’m sorry Russia and the Russian language, I should not have believed what the man, who on reflection was sold to me as the great himbo detective, said.

Susato’s buying it!

Susato look into my eyes and tell me Ryunosuke could ever make it as a soldier.

No, please do!

And the bullet flies a mile wide!

I’m still upset about Kazuma, but I’m somehow also having the time of my life

SUSATO YOU KNOW I’M FROM JAPAN!!!

SHE TOOK ME OUT!!!

AND MY GOD AM I HERE FOR IT!!!

Ryunosuke’s finally snapped!

What I find amazing is that the Sherlock Holmes Herlock Sholmes stories clearly exist, basically unchanged in this world. So either Dr Watson Wilson was either lying through his teeth to spare his friend’s feelings, or he is the stopped clock is right twice a day person who Herlock actually hit the nail on the head for, and therefore he believed everything that was said.

‘On rout to foreign climates’ that’s how ships work Herlock!

Exactly!

I’ll say one thing for Herlock though, you can’t beat him down!

How am I both Ryunosuke and Susato in this scene?

Yeah Naruhodo-san! I thought you read detective stories!

Quick Susato! Get him to sign a copy!

Um... has no one told him yet...

I’m also curious about the fact that he still believes Dr Wilson’s in London. Either there are two Dr Wilson’s, or something weird is going on here.

Look at his hat Ryunosuke, it contains all the information you need

He got his own name wrong!

Hosonaga, I don’t know if you can hear from wherever you are on this ship dressed as a sailor, but there is a fight and you are rapidly losing!

(Also to be fair to Herlock, as someone who’s been playing a lot of Hitman recently, looking inside the wardrobe already means he’s doing a lot better than literally every character in that game.)

Ok so it was Russian then and I no longer have to apologies!

Do you think Herlock has ever been to Russia?

Ok Mr ‘is this cow a cat?’

:(((((((

HERLOCK THAT LOOKS NOTHING LIKE ME!!!

Ok everyone, we’re also on the lookout for a missing Russian Ballerina along with Kazuma’s killer. I don’t know how, but I wouldn’t have been told about her if she wasn’t relevant

I can’t believe we’ve finally found the vindictive part of Ryunosuke’s beautiful personality!

We’re finally reading Kazuma’s diary!

Oh fuck, Kazuma was bitten by an adder

Wait, if that was the case why didn’t he dispatch it with his big sword? We’ve seen him do precision work before, so that can’t be it.

Either way, I think we really need to talk to the person in the room next to mine.

Also: Herlock Sholmes gets seasick!

Did she just break my cuffs?

My mistake she’s just showing some tough love to get me to buck up!

Let’s go team!

HOSONAGA!!!

“What are you doing here?” “I think that should be my line” This feels like that meme of the two Spidermen pointing at each other

I wouldn’t be so sure Susato. Hosonaga seems a lot like me, a bunch of disabilities held together by sheer force of will.

He still has a job!

(Or his superiors are just trying to send him as far away from Japan as they can)

HELL YEAH HOSONAGA, LETS PUNCH THE RULES UNTIL THEY SQUEAK!

(Also your superiors are definitely trying to ship you out)

Oh...

That would explain Kazuma’s whole vibe.

Although something about this feels wrong. No disrespect to Hosonaga, but as determined as he is he doesn’t exactly have the physical prowess you’d associate with stopping an assassination. I know I haven’t exactly seen him at work yet, but something about this feels like he was set up to fail.

Now the thing is, that while he can cut it as a waiter, Hosonaga isn’t exactly built to fit in among sailors. It’s not going to take a genius therefore, to work out who Kazuma’s guard is, especially if he’s been around Kazuma from dawn till dusk. That’s probably why his killer had to kill him in his cabin, and it’s also why they probably drugged his food (which means they didn’t know him enough to know he didn’t like chicken)

:(((((((((((((

On the plus side though, it looks as though Hosonaga believes in my innocence.

Come on Hosonaga, remember when you bought Miss Brett to us!

Hell yeah Hosonaga!

Hosonaga heard my call! He heard that he was losing his place as my second favourite character and came back swinging!!!

Determination Ryunosuke!

Also probably hacking up a lot of blood, that does wonders to unnerve people in my experience

Now, I should present Kazuma’s diary here... but...

Yes, everything is as it should be...

He’s digging it!

Oh no he took it as an insult!

Sorry Ryunosuke, that’s the crime scene thief’s now

Ok let’s do this properly then

Yeah boy!

LETS DO THIS TEAM!!!

Ryunosuke, do you remember nothing about this man?

Hosonaga didn’t come here to play!

Ok, we’re moving on out (except not right now because I’ve still got a couple of things to look at before we go)

I think Ryunosuke might be a bad influence on Susato...

Also I feel like I’ve pegged Susato wrong regarding the rules. Susato’s just very good at keeping up the appearance of following them.

Come to think of it, the fact she’s a judicial assistant, despite women apparently not being allowed in the Japanese court other than to testify should have clued me in.

Susato Mikotoba: Breaking the rules in front of you, but in a way you don’t notice

(Also the bell pull’s not working, but I think we all expected that)

Susato I’ve been living in a cupboard!

Don’t pity me!

Ok, so I’m not quite sure when Ryunosuke and I started thinking as one, but we’ve all agreed it’s happening now

Ryunosuke do not get caught in the mousetrap!

Susato can see right through me (Ryunosuke)

Umm...

This is the Phoenix Maya dynamic inverted, and I am living for it.

Susato: Now this is an emergency button, it’s very important you do NOT press it!

Ryunosuke: *lunges for the trigger*

It feels amazing being the wayward partner!

Our rout into cabin 2’s blocked by approximately 1 ton of sailor, so for now Susato and I will have to dick around avenge Kazuma out here in the corridor.

It seems that last night’s log is mostly blank, so I’m guessing I was right about the sailor on duty skiving off.

Hmm, so the person in the next cabin’s probably quite important then. Given what just happened with Miss Brett that’s not a good sign.

And it seems like I’m not allowed to visit whoever it is without an invitation... which might prove tricky given as how there in there and I’m out here

Ah good, a Western Gentleman, that’s just what we need!

Hmmmmm

These guys left their post for a while didn’t they?

Either that or there’s something (or someone) they’re keeping off the records.

This might be a bit of a wide shot, but that mousetrap makes me wonder if the crew has some sort of secret pet squirrelled away somewhere. It doesn’t entirely add up what with them putting traps down, but with everyone in Ace Attorney having something to hide it’s all I can think of now.

Bif Strogenov’s left to report to the captain, nows our window to violate some privacy!

HERLOCK SHOLMES!!!

Shot down!

Herlock that thing’s tiny, I don’t think anyone’s in there!

It moved!

Guess I’m eating my words!

Herlock???

Ok, we’re not allowed to look inside the case, or indeed anything, but fortunately we have HERLOCK SHOLMES THE GREAT HIMBO DETECTIVE!!!

Deduce away Herlock!

Herlock... are you about to tell this man that he’s also the Russian Assasin? Are you going to do this round the whole ship until you get it right?

Wait this is working!?!

Herlock Sholmes is Susato’s one blind spot and Ryunosuke’s one point of clarity

CHOOCHOO!!!

THIS IS AMAZING!

He’s not entirely right though...

(Editors note: I completely managed to miss capturing 90% of the ? icons)

I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!

HERLOCK LOOK AT THIS MAN’S NOSE, LOOK AT MY FACE! NOW LOOK AT THE MAN IN THE PORTRAIT!

However, the newspaper in his pocket and the little ! icon seems to suggest there’s some connection there.

(Editors note: I also managed to miss every ! icon)

And there is a crime being committed, but it’s not to do with the case.

Yeah, it probably just contains one of those pets we’re not supposed to have.

So... a baby?

So do a lot of people Susato

Ok, so The Great Himbo Detective is actually really good at making observations, it’s just how he applies them that’s shit.

I wonder if this is what Dr Wilson did for their partnership, but he just cut out the bits where he said things like: Herlock these people have completely different faces, maybe there’s a different reason they’ve got the paper?

Ryunosuke normally: The fact Hosonaga’s working in this restaurant clearly means he’s struggling financially!

Ryunosuke around Herlock: You can’t just say the first guess that pops into your head!

HERLOCK BUSTED US OUT!!!

(Ok he’s also the reason we were in handcuffs, but still)

Olay!

What! Noooooo!

‘Course Correction: Hold it Mr Sholmes!’ What a title!

Important news just in: Ryunosuke can’t grow a beard

A part of me says that he was about to use the sheers to cut up that paper, but there are obviously other copies around the ship, so unless he’s planning a sheers rampage that can’t be right.

Hello!

Wait a second... with that reaction to the paper... is there a Russian Ballerina in there?

WE DID THE HERLOCK SHOLMES COOL SPIN AND CLICK!!!

Also look at Ryunosuke’s little cocky smirk!

He’s really getting into this!

And I couldn’t be more proud!

We’re tag teaming it!

Herlock I swear to god if you tell me she’s that assassin

WHAT DID I JUST SAY!

(Editors note: Got that one!)

I sure am Susato!

Keep telling yourself that Ryunosuke, we can all see the truth

Ah, so the nose was fake too

That makes a lot more sense now!

Well she did disappear with a priceless tiara

He said, rubbing his hand in glee

This is definitely the start of a beautiful friendship!

Damn straight I do!

Bingo

For some reason I pictured it as being pink though, I don’t know why

Anyway so, while Nikolina does need money it seems that she didn’t steal the tiara. Apparently it was given to her as a present.

Also Nikolina is only 15, and has run away by herself for reasons currently unknown. I’m starting to get the feeling that the crew (or at least the two we’ve met) might have been looking out for her.

Oh yeah, the moving travel case!

Given the rules regarding pets, I wonder if that’s what’s in there? It would explain the attitude of the sailors we met.

Is it the Russian Revolutionary Herlock? You have to tell us if it is...

He’s learning!

Yep, she’s looking at the pet rule sign, now show me the pet!

Whoooooooo!

Yeah, I’m pretty sure the guys on the door were covering for her (and probably her pet too)

Hmm, so Nikolina’s running from someone, so she decided to disguise herself to be safe and has been a jumble of nerve ever since.

Can I see...

Bless you Nikolina, but you’re not the best at keeping secrets. I’m pretty sure the crew have collectively decided to just look the other way and let the traumatised 15 year old have her pet.

HE CUFFED ME AGIAN!!!

I wonder if Nikolina’s beloved pet’s a snake?

Can I just...

:(

Fine...

No, everyone must see my badge!

HA!

:(

:D

Ok now let’s go back to actually playing the game!

So, because she’s a jumble of nerves, Nikolina hasn’t been noticing much about what’s been happening around her. However I think she’d have probably noticed signs of danger, like loud noises, so I’m a little curious as to why she didn’t pick up on the sound of the tableware being sent to the floor.

From what I can gather about her ‘never dancing again’ whatever happened probably has something to do with the ballet.

Either that or she’s worried about being linked with her old life if she goes back on the scene under another name.

That’s a good point actually, while people are funny and I can get her wanting a memento of her life, that’s an incredibly distinctive memento to have.

It must have some sort of emotional significance, I think she said it was given to her by an Earl, so maybe her father?

Hmm, that’s a pretty distinctive thing to try and pawn Nikolina.

Yikes! So the Novavich Ballet’s got really unethical working conditions. (Which probably shouldn’t be too much of a shock given the time period.) Now I understand why Nikolina’s so keen to never put herself in that situation again.

Yeah, I thought that was the case.

Huh?

Oh yeah... that is odd

Ah, so that’s why everyone was so on edge!

Right...

(I feel like this would carry more weight if we hadn’t just been flashing our badge at anyone who looks our way)

Now onto the most important question:

HERLOCK NO!

Susato is me (but personally I’m hoping for a kitten)

Ok Genius, what sort of animal is it?

I’ll eat your funky hat if that’s true Herlock

Important information 2: Never trust Herlock with a pet

Please let it be that we were Kazuma’s pet

Wait no, I’m an idiot. I’m obviously supposed to ask about the speckled band

Wow she changed quick!

She’s leaving to talk to the captain, is this our chance to meet her friend!?!

Booooo, we’ve been chucked out!!!

[angstyaches]

I’ve Been Away Pt. 2

Part One

CW: anxiety, nausea, indigestion, hospital/nursing home setting, past death mention, degenerative illness, memory loss (dementia), loss of sight, family drama/issues very vaguely implied.

AN: I’ve been sitting on this for so long that everything is now obvious to me, and I’m sorry if it’s a lot more vague/confusing than I think it is. Hopefully Part Three will clear things up if so.

___

“Are you gonna go in?” Shayne asked quietly.

Felix swallowed thickly as the silence broke. He hadn’t even realised Shayne had woken up; he’d been sleeping since about thirty minutes after they’d left, and now it was four hours later.

“I am,” Felix said, trying to sound firm despite the queasy tremble in his voice. He stared out the windscreen at the pale orange building that ran in a semi-circle around the car park. The paint job looked fresh and clean, and the whole scene – even the car park – radiated a silence that reminded Felix of a graveyard. Even the pale blossoms that sprung from the bushes lining the pavement made him think of funeral flowers. He’d seen pictures of the place online, but actually being here felt… strange. 

It was like he was stepping into a life that wasn’t his anymore.

He cringed at the sudden wrenching sensation in his gut. His stomach gave a low grumble as it shifted. He swallowed yet again, gently bringing the back of his hand to his mouth and stifling a weak burp that had crept up. He’d picked up indigestion tablets when he’d stopped to get petrol, but the chalky chunks hadn’t worked too effectively against the rising tide of stress in his belly.

“Did we drive here in silence just to sit here in more silence?”

Felix frowned at that. “We only drove in silence because you fell asleep.”

“Yeah, for about an hour.”

“You were awake for two hours and you didn’t say anything? You didn’t even ask where we were going.”

Shayne gave a lazy shrug. “Didn’t seem like you wanted to talk about it.”

Another uneasy belch rumbled in Felix’s belly. His shoulders moved forward slightly as it slipped up his throat. “Ugh. I really don’t feel well.”

Shayne gestured towards the main building. “I’m sure they’ve got a shit tonne of doctors inside. Wait, are we here to ask about checking Elliott in? He told me the other day that he’s almost seventy in human years, so it’s good that you’re thinking about where to stick him next.”

Felix sighed deeply, wishing he had the energy to deal with the joke, but the thought of Elliott only made his stomach and chest burn even more. He wanted this to be over. He wanted to go home and see his partner.

“Okay,” he said, tightening his grip on the steering wheel and inhaling deeply. “Wish me luck, buddy. I’m going in.”

“Okay, bye, then.”

By the time the long breath was released from Felix’s lungs, his hands hadn’t left the steering wheel of the parked car.

“You’re still sitting there,” Shayne mumbled in a sing-song voice.

“Yes, I’m aware,” Felix replied, sticking a thumb nail between his teeth and biting down on it. He wondered with a shiver of fresh anxiety if he was actually thirsty; should he have packed one of his lollipops to tide him over? Was it even safe for him to go, unescorted, into a building where there were likely needles and blood bags and other such contraptions? Had he really done such a bad job of thinking this through?

Had coming here been a complete mistake?

“Felix…”

“Yes, I know, I’m going,” Felix insisted quietly, an uncertain hand rubbing at his belly. 

“Jesus, are you okay, or what’s going on?”

“I’m fine, I’ve just got… a tad of stupid indigestion.” A slight flush of heat rose to Felix’s cheeks as he felt his stomach gurgle under his hand. “Happens when I’m nervous.”

Shayne clicked his tongue and reached across to undo his seatbelt. “God, if you’re this fucking worked up, what if I go inside with you?”

Felix raised his eyebrows. “Would you really?” he gushed softly.

“Please don’t make this weird and emotional.”

“I always knew you loved me, cuz.”

“Aw. It’s like you think I won’t punch you in the throat.”

___

At least Felix couldn’t have said that the place smelled like death; there was quite a pleasant, disinfectant smell from the moment they stepped through the doors. Well, maybe not pleasant, but it was at least reassuring. The floors were old – beige linoleum from the 90s, it seemed – but they glistened, all the way from the reception desk to the open-plan recreational space at the far side of the lobby. Felix could see at least six figures seated in armchairs, one of them being attended by a nurse while another was shaking a walking stick in the direction of a flat-screen TV.

He swallowed, blinking in surprise when he turned his head and someone had spotted them. Another nurse, a bit older than the one across the room.

“Hi!” the young nurse chirped, glancing at Shayne first, and then at Felix. “Are you here visiting someone?”

Felix’s grip on his documents and newspaper clippings tightened. He wished he’d put them in a folder instead of carrying it all around so conspicuously. His jaw was heavy and his throat was clenched. Yes, he thought, willing his lips to move. How had he forgotten how to form the word yes?!

“Yeah, we are,” Shayne piped up, his voice slightly higher to mimic the tone of the nurse’s.

“Great, what’s the name?”

This time, Felix knew he couldn’t cop out of giving an answer. Shayne could have been the most helpful person in the world, but he wasn’t a mind reader. Felix cleared his throat, swallowing a burning belch before it could burst out of his mouth. “Patri- Patricia Bramley.”

The nurse pursed their lips as they referred to a clipboard on the desk in front of them.

Felix swallowed, fidgeting with the zipper on his jacket. “Trish,” he mumbled.

“Ah, Trish,” the nurse repeated with an air of recognition.

There was a beat of silence that Felix’s mind filled in with disturbing readiness; he braced himself for a look of discomfort or despair to cross the nurse’s face, and for them to gently explain that Trish had been dead for years; that she had wept every night out of loneliness until the loneliness ate so deeply into her heart that it gave out, and that whoever was responsible should –

“She’s actually in her room right now,” the nurse said, an easy smile crossing their face. “She might be sleeping, but if she’s awake, she’ll be very happy to see some visitors.  Is one of you Avery, by any chance?”

The nurse’s gaze was more focused on Shayne as the question was asked, and Shayne quickly responded, “Uh, no.”

A panicked laugh burst past Felix’s lips, causing the nurse to throw him a confused look.

“Nephews, we’re – we’re Trish’s nephews,” he said, hoping his voice wasn’t as shaky as he sounded. “I’m Felix, and this is Shayne.”

“Alright, well, come this way,” the nurse instructed, guiding them towards a hallway to the west of the communal area.

Felix glanced towards the gathering of recliner armchairs and end tables, momentarily drinking in the sound of daytime TV and murmured conversation, before his chest tightened all over again. There was a shakiness in his bones and an empty longing in the pit of his stomach, and he realised he was missing Elliott. All of this could have been so much easier if he’d had Elliott’s hand to hold onto, Elliott’s calming voice to reassure him, Elliott’s easy smile to turn to.

“I can’t remember the last time Trish had a visitor, so this is exciting! She’s going to be delighted. Do you live far away, or..?”

“Mmm, something like that,” Shayne was telling the nurse, meeting Felix’s gaze as he looked forward again. His eyebrows were pulled together, question marks basically jumping out the top of his head. Felix gave a nervous smile that he was sure looked more like a queasy grimace, because he sure was feeling queasy, and the smell of disinfectant was suddenly not helping.

The nurse slowed by a private bedroom, peering around the door. “Here we go – ah, looks like she’s awake after all! Afternoon, Trish!”

Felix’s stomach pretty much hit the floor as he stepped into the room after Shayne and the nurse. The disinfectant smell vanished, talcum powder and the smell of roses swamping the air instead. She had always loved roses and had filled the house with them and doused herself with rose perfumes. Felix could practically hear her singing something in a soft, low voice as he inhaled, though his memory hadn’t held onto any words of the song.

Sunlight trailed gently through a netted curtain, warming the magnolia walls. A knitted purple blanket was thrown across her lower body as she cradled something to her chest with both hands, something that Felix couldn’t quite see. All he could tell was that they had cut her hair. She had always said she wanted to keep her hair long, even into her old age. She’d always been braiding it and twirling it between her fingers. He almost let himself get angry about it, before he realised that no one had been there to tell them to do otherwise – not even him.

“Trish? Your nephews are here to see you,” the nurse exclaimed happily. “Why don’t we sit you up, so you can have a chat?”

“Who – who is that?” the woman whimpered, reaching out a hand, which the nurse promptly took.

“It’s Andy, Mrs. Bramley,” the nurse replied, speaking a little more firmly this time. “I’m here with two of your nephews, isn’t that nice?”

The numbness began to spread out from Felix’s chest as the nurse adjusted the hospital bed so that the silver-haired woman was almost upright without the danger of slumping forward. Soft eyes that had once held such warmth and recognition were unfocused and foggy, never landing anywhere for longer than a few seconds.

She can’t see.

Just how long had he been away?

Shayne backed up a couple of steps, briefly meeting Felix’s panicked gaze, and then swept a hand through the air to beckon him further into the room.

“I-I –” Felix’s stomach flipped as he shook his head, pushing another bubble of acidic air towards his throat. “Shayne, I can’t – I-I don’t think I can do this.”

“Nephews?” the woman mumbled.

“Yeah, your nephews…” Nurse Andy looked at Shayne, beckoning him to the other side of the bed. “Felix and – Shayne, was it?”

“Uh, yeah, that’s me,” Shayne said, awkwardly letting himself be guided into a stiff plastic chair.

Felix lingered by the opposite wall, smiling weakly at the nurse as they glanced over at him.

“Shayne and Felix are here,” Andy repeated for the sake of Patricia’s hearing. “They’re gonna talk to you for a little while, okay? And I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes with your lunch.”

“Ah…” Patricia nodded slowly, a nervous twitch of a smile crossing her face. “Oliver will want steak for his lunch. But don’t let him near the whisky cabinet until the sun goes down.”

Andy shot Shayne and Felix a smile that said good luck, and left.

There was dead silence for what felt like the longest time, in which the woman turned her head to look in the direction the window. Felix could barely see her face now.

Shayne sat forward in the armchair, elbows resting on his knees. Felix felt his gaze land on him briefly before he stared at the floor. “Are you okay?”

Felix opened his mouth to answer, but Patricia answered first. Shayne’s head shot up at the sound of her voice, his eyes wide.

“Oh, I’m quite fine, sweetheart,” she replied, tilting her head in Shayne’s direction. “You can tell your father I’m quite alright.”

Shayne made brief eye contact with Felix again, before a wandering hand caught his attention. He seemed to automatically reach up to let it rest against his own palm, and the woman tightened her grip around it.

“I’m…” Shayne shifted in the chair and cleared his throat. “Patricia, I’m not – I’m not your son.”

“Oh, my son…” Patricia gave a low chuckle. “Are you friends with Avery?”

Felix felt his hair stand on end, bristling with a cold that just wasn’t there. He expected another look from Shayne, but he didn’t get one.

“Avery?” Shayne’s voice was surprisingly soft. He continued letting her hold his hand, which Felix found surprising.

A pinch of anxiety made Felix’s skin bristle. He shook his head in denial, thinking maybe he could shake the name out of his head; he hadn’t heard it in so long, and it felt like it would have dragged a gasp out of him, if he could bring himself to breathe at all. He looked down and rearranged his feet on the spotless linoleum floor. The nerves were a permanent tingling knot in the pit of his belly, a sour taste in the back of his throat that he couldn’t get rid of. Tears burned his eyes and throat, the kind that he knew would overwhelm him for hours if he let them fall.

“That’s a… nice name,” Shayne was saying.

“No,” Patricia mumbled, shaking her head with curious ambition. “My baby was never Avery, not for a single… Oh, I have to – have to pick him up at two o’clock. Have to – have to wash Avery’s hands, Avery’s little hands… Oliver hates mess. Hates it in the house.”

“Shayne,” Felix whispered, taking a step backwards, towards the door.

Shayne looked up. “What?” he hissed.

“I think we – we should – we should go,” Felix whimpered. He was starting to feel very, very ill, now that he was able to put a face, a voice, a set of memories, to the sketch outline he’d kept in his head. These were names and things he hadn’t let himself even think about for thirteen years. He’d put all of this in a box – in a coffin, more or less – and had never intended on opening it.

He lifted the back of his hand and turned his head to let out a couple of deep, anxious belches, trying his best to keep his eyes from watering.

“Hey, Trish?” Shayne said, starting to get up from the chair. “I have to go to the bathroom, but my friend’s going to keep talking to you. Right?”

“Wh-what?” Felix stammered. His heart leapt as Shayne nodded to the chair, beckoning for Felix to come around the bed and take his seat. Bitter acid licked the back of his throat.

“Yeah, come on, sit down,” Shayne said loudly, using that same breezy voice he’d put on when he’d spoken to Nurse Andy. It seemed to prick up Patricia’s ears and hold her attention, because she turned her head slightly, as though searching for

Felix’s hands shook as he laid his documents down on the bedside locker and then shuffled around the end of the bed. He let his weight sit at the very edge of the seat, legs too twitchy with nervous energy to sit all the way back. He glanced up as he sensed Shayne moving away.

He gently grabbed onto the dark-haired boy’s arm.

“Shayne,” Felix whispered, feeling the break in his own voice as it trembled.

“Relax, I’m right fucking here,” Shayne whispered. He cleared his throat and broke out the peppy voice from before. “Hey, Trish, this is my friend. His name’s –”

“Felix,” Felix murmured, gently laying his hand over the back of hers. The contact was surreal, like he was holding a hand made of wax, and he might have dropped it again out of abject fear, if she hadn’t closed her fingers around his. “I’m… I’m Felix.”

“Hello, sweetheart.”

“H-hi, how – how are you doing?”

“Oh, I was just weeding the flower beds.”

Felix’s heart sank. He wasn’t sure what exactly he’d been expecting; it wasn’t as though touching her own flesh and blood would suddenly bring back the coherency that had been eaten away by the dementia over the years.

“Sorry,” he whispered, clearing his throat and staring at the back of her hand. The words felt and sounded insufficient for what he needed them for, and yet he couldn’t think of any better ones. “I’ve been away for a, um, a long time, and I’m – I’m really sorry.”

Nothing changed on her face, nothing to indicate that she was taking any of what he was saying in. He felt a flutter of relief in his chest.

He realised Shayne wasn’t listening, either; in fact, he’d gone around to the other side of the bed and picked up something from Felix’s pile of papers. Felix didn’t have the heart to say anything to stop him.

“Oliver Bramley,” Shayne mumbled, frowning at a cutting from a newspaper. “Her husband’s a tech guy, apparently he’s worth millions.”

Felix squeezed Patricia’s hand and watched as Shayne flipped to the next clipping.

“Oh,” Shayne said, almost immediately after seeing the next headline. “He was worth millions. He’s been dead a few years…” His voice drifted off as he read to the end of the article. He looked up at Felix. “It says Avery’s dead too.”

“Yeah,” Felix said softly, turning his gaze towards her again. Her expression was peaceful, and her hands were gentle as they both cupped Felix’s. Her fingers, he realised, were drifting softly across his skin, a little more pointedly than Felix felt comfortable with. It looked like she was feeling for a watch or a bracelet, until she pressed the pads of her fingers into his wrist, as though she was checking his pulse.

Felix’s stomach flipped as he realised what was happening.

She was checking whether or not he had a pulse.

Felix sat up straight and tried to pull his hand free, but couldn’t bring himself to do it. Patricia jumped slightly, and lifted her head as though to meet his gaze, even though she couldn’t. He blinked, and tears dropped onto his lap.

All of the things he’d thought, at some time or another, that he’d like to say to her, seemed to evaporate straight off his tongue. His throat was probably too dry to form any words, in any case.

“Felix,” Patricia whispered, that smile breezing across her face again. As he looked up at her and blinked away tears, he envisioned the years melting out of her skin, her face quickly becoming the one that he remembered.

“Yeah,” he said, nodding briskly and trying to ignore the tears that were gathering in his eyes. He had never believed he’d hear that name being spoken by that voice.

“That suits you much better, darling.”

[bts-hyperfixation]

Save Me From Tears

I'm fairly certain this was requested by @jeonssimp but I have lost the ask 🤦🏼‍♀️ it 2+19 Jungkook anyway 💜

Christmas last year –

“Hey baby” Jungkook whispers as he wraps his arms around your waist making you jump. You’d been too busy admiring your decorating handiwork. “It looks amazing in here.” He makes you turn with him as he takes in the whole of your living room.

“What are you doing home so early?” you wriggle from his grasp so you can look at him. Admiring how his adorable winter jumper clashed horribly with his red tinged hair, you fail to notice the sad tinge hidden behind his bunny smile.

“Baby listen… I’m really sorry but I have to work this Christmas.” He pulls you to him as you try to supress your sadness. It’s not like he could help it and you knew that going into this relationship.

“Oh… that’s okay, maybe we could do a late Christmas when you get home, or we can celebrate new year or…” he kisses you before breaking even more bad news.

“I’m going to be gone for four weeks, we have tours and shows set up everywhere. Originally, we were supposed to be off for the big holidays but then we were offered a spot in the New York New Years Eve show. I’m so sorry, I know this was supposed to be our first big holiday together.” You meet his big bunny eyes as he pleads for forgiveness and you can’t help but give in. you know he would be there with you if he could.

By the time Christmas comes around you’re all alone in your Seoul apartment. You thought Kookie might call you in the morning, but when he doesn’t you put it down to time zones and go about your day. You try anything to get your mind off of your aching heart. Baking, reading, gaming, but nothing seems to work. Eventually you turn to TV, hoping to find a Christmas movie to help you wallow in your loneliness. Instead, you find a flashing news bulletin about BTS.

Korean golden boys BTS seen out Christmas partying in New York City.

You freeze when you see images appear to accompany the story. Jungkook had a gorgeous blonde hung around his neck as he laughed with the boys. It felt like you might throw up. When he didn’t call you assumed he was asleep, or at least busy with show preparations. Nothing like this ever crossed your mind. You switched off the TV and ran into your bedroom, grabbing the things he’d left behind at your place and shoving them into a bag. You couldn’t stand the sight of anything to do with him.

Here you were feeling sorry for yourself and missing him terribly and he was partying with random American girls he didn’t even know. Eventually he did call you, all you did was hang up. He kept trying and every time you hung up. In a last ditch attempt he sent a text.

‘Baby? Are you okay? I keep calling and getting cut off. Anyway, it’s Christmas morning here and I miss you like crazy. Call me when you can. I love you.’

You scoff at the text, almost chucking your phone across the room. Instead, you send the picture circulating the news of him and the girl and one word.

‘Done.’

You don’t wait for his reply as you block his number.

Late November this year –

You hadn’t seen Jungkook since Christmas. Hadn’t spoken to him since he went through all your social media channels to try to explain himself to you. Nothing he could’ve said would’ve changed your mind at that point, too wound up to even attempt to listen to his pathetic excuses.

That’s why you were so surprised to see him walk into the shop you work in. his hair is longer now, a lot longer. It frames his face nicely. Your fairly certain he hasn’t seen you yet and you panic. Ducking under the counter, you try to crab walk into the cupboard. Unfortunately, you manage to pull a box of Christmas ordering brochures on top of yourself.

“Shit, are you oka…” he trails off when he sees its you. The heat rises to your cheeks as he stares at you in disbelief. “Y/N…” he reaches out a hand to you, you take it reluctantly and he drags you to your feet. You hold on a little too long.

“Jungkook, how are you?” you shake your head to break the eye contact. Seeing him brings back every horrible feeling from last Christmas, as well as every wonderful one you had been trying to forget in an attempt to move on from him. You busy yourself picking up the brochures, hoping he would take the hint and disappear.

“I’ve been shit Y/N-ah” the pain in his voice makes your heart break all over again. “You just cut off all contact, you wouldn’t see me, wouldn’t talk to me, wouldn’t let me explain. It hurt like hell.” You turn on him when he tries to place some of the blame on you.

“LET YOU EXPLAIN!?” several customers heads turn your way as you yell at the boy. You take a deep breath and force yourself to lower your tone. “You know what Jungkook? I am work I don’t want to do this here, or ever… just leave, please.” As you walk away from him, worried tears will spill if you don’t remove yourself from shop floor at that moment, but he grasps your wrist and pulls you back to him.

“Please Y/N it’s been months and I still can’t stop thinking about you and how I hurt you. Have coffee with me, just once and I will go away forever if you still don’t want to me.” You relent, if only just to get him out of your face.

The next day you find yourself sat in a little coffee shop by the Han river, the very one you’d met in. You anxiously peel at the label on your water bottle, deciding it was safer than a hot drink for the conversation you were about to endure. The sound of the bell makes you look up. He saunters in, stunning in skinny jeans and a biker jacket, the new undercut on full display, it’s evident he’s put a lot of thought into how he looks. His face is set in a heavy frown until he sees you, then his bunny smile appears full force. It melts your heart, until you remember why you’re there.

“You came.” He reaches for your hand across the table, but you pull it out of his reach. He looks dejected but excepts your response.

“Hurry up and say whatever it is you want to say.” You refuse to meet his gaze, knowing it’ll be so much harder to keep up your resolve if you looked at him. He sighs but accepts that what he is getting is better than nothing.

“I’m still not 100% sure how paparazzi got that picture of us last Christmas, but that girl was just very handsy ARMY. She meant nothing more to me than any other ARMY members. It broke my heart when you wouldn’t let me explain, even more when I realised what little trust you had in me…”

“You’re blaming this on me?!” you’re practically hissing at him across the table.

“No, I’m not blaming this on you, we should’ve been on better guard, I should’ve been home to call you the minute it was Christmas here, I should’ve flown home the second I knew something was wrong.” He reaches for your hand again; you don’t pull away. “I am asking that you give me another chance.” The two of you spend a long time in the coffee shop, talking over other insecurities in your relationship. You have no idea how you get to this point but the two of you leave hand in hand, full of smiles and fixed promise.

This Christmas –

The holiday season comes around quick. You and Jungkook have been sickeningly happy since you rekindled your relationship a little over a month ago. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop the doubts from creeping in as Christmas day kept closer.

“Decorations look great baby.” Jungkook says as he walks through the front door to your apartment. He kisses you on the cheek and takes your hand, spinning you to the beat of the Christmas music you have blasting over the speakers. You’re dizzy by the time he finally lets you go. The two of you collapse onto your sofa together, cuddling in close. Jungkook’s phone buzzes and you watch his brows knit together in concern as he reads the text.

“Everything okay?” you ask mirroring his concern.

“Umm yeah… I’ve just got to call Namjoon, give me two seconds.” He untangles himself from your embrace and heads into the kitchen for some privacy. You’ve already guessed what the phone call is about when he re-enters the living room. You shake your head in disbelief as he bites his lip nervously. “I’m really sorry baby… I have to work again this Christmas…”

“Last Christmas you broke my heart…” he looks close to crying as those words leave your lips. “If you think I’m gonna let you do it again, you’re dead wrong.” You stand and move to meet him by the doorway. “Take me with you.” He looks shocked at the suggestion but considers it for a moment.

“What about your job?”

“Fuck my job.” You wrap your arms around him and tilt your head up to face him. “I can get another job, I can’t get another you.”

Masterlist

Christmas list

[t-o-m-hollands]

Tom x You

Summery: Tom and his brothers have a pub. You, trying to avoid working on your new album, spend most of your time in there. Lots of flirting and bickering ensues.

Themes: Sort of frienemies to lovers, slow burn, mutual attraction but they are both to dumb to realise. General dumbness all around. Idiots in love.

Word count: 4k

Warnings: Drinking and swearing. Smut in future chapters.

PART I of IV

***

At 8 years of age your father hands you a worn guitar and with the patience of a saint teaches you how to make it play the holiest of sounds. Every day you practise, until your fingertips has hardened and they move effortlessly over the strings.  

At 10 years of age you write your first song. It’s a puerile little tune about a sweet boy with hair like honey and an opportunity lost. It’s repetitive and nonsensical but your mother hums the chorus for weeks after hearing it.

At 14 years of age you meet up with a record label and when signing the dotted line on the contract you feel a chill down your spine and your grandmother’s stories about the crossroad demon comes back to you verbatim. With determination you still put your name on the paper in a signature you’ve spent hours practising. Only days later you hear your voice on the radio for the very first time.

At 17 years of age there are headlines in magazines about you, photos of men they claim you’ve dated and interviews with people who claim to be a ‘close source’ to you, even though you’ve never met them, spilling lies on every page. You find out your closest friend has sold information about you to the tabloids for over a year.

At 19 years of age you go on a world tour, though the only parts of the world you see are airports, hotels and playing venues and then later at night: nightclubs. You travel the world, but you learn nothing about it.

At 22 years of age and your boyfriend breaks up with you for an actress. There isn’t a day that year that tabloids don’t ‘report’ on it. He spends most of the time telling the world how much happier he is in his new relationship, and you spend most of your time staring down into a bottle.  

At 24 years of age you feel drained, dog-tired and worn out. On a regular basis there’s photos of you stumbling out of pubs, bars and restaurants all over the internet. Your record label is threatening a lawsuit and you haven’t talked to your manager in weeks. You have no friends and your family doesn’t know what to do with you.  

Okay, so maybe being a successful singer isn’t all that it’s cut out to be. Especially not when the entirety of the internet is making fun of you.  

And yes, maybe you’re in a flunk and haven’t written anything decent in months. And okay, maybe you haven’t even picked up a guitar in weeks. And maybe throwing away your phone in order not to have to face the record label was a bad idea. And maybe, hand on heart, the right solution to your problems is not to waste your days away in a well-hidden pub in a backstreet in London with the cutest pub owner you’ve ever seen, with biceps that makes you want to drool. A pub owner who has no interest in you and finds you annoying beyond belief.  

Yet here you are,  

again.

***

“It’s Tuesday” Tom informs you as he hands you cherry coke and a straw.

So, it goes like this. Tom is obsessed with time. He’s always informing you of either what day of the week it is, or the time of day. As if he’s trying to shame you into realising that 10 am on a Tuesday is not an acceptable time to order a dry martini.  

“So?” You ask, feigning ignorance as you open the can. “And don’t think I haven’t noticed that this is a coke and in fact completely free of alcohol. I mean in the good ol’ day they at least had the cutesy to put cocaine in there.”.

“Don’t worry” he says, scrubbing the surface of the already clean counter-top “there’s a shit load of other stuff that’ll destroy your insides in there”.

You try not to roll your eyes, honestly you do. You fail. “Oh no, is it sugar? Please, doctor say it isn’t sugar!” you wail dramatically.

“No, not just sugar” and you can tell he’s also trying not to roll his eyes at your exaggerated play acting. “You know, I saw this documentary once about what they put in coca cola and –”

“No, nope, no, no. Absolutely not” You shake your head vehemently as if that will stop his words. "I would literally rather hear you talk about goddamn golf for an hour than put me of one of life’s few great pleasures”.

This time he doesn’t manage to stop himself from rolling his eyes at you. “Oh, I think we both know you find more pleasures in life than coca cola”.

Before you can answer him something insanely witty the door to the office behind the bar opens and an anxious looking Harrison step out. “Tom, Sam says the fish delivery didn’t show up again so we’re out of cod and therefore fish ‘n chips.”  

Tom rubs his face, looking worried. “Alright, I’ll call him up and see what happened.”  

But Harrison still looks tense. “Also…” he trails off, losing courage.  

“Also, what?” And Tom too sounds tense now.  

“Well, Downey from the bank called, he says the invoice is way over due and he wants a meeting. I told him you’d call today”.  

Tom keeps rubbing his forehead, as if to literally fight of a migraine, and his shoulders tense. “Yeah, yeah I’ll call him this afternoon”. Harrison nods and walks back into the kitchen

“You know, I cou –” but you don’t get to finish your sentence before he interrupts you. “Don’t” he says, voice sharp as a whip.

“But, it would just be a loan, honestly I – ”

“No, and I mean it.” And you judging by the tone of voice he uses and the stern look he gives you you’re well aware that he isn’t joking. It’s like his usually warm and kind eyes are nailing you down into your seat. “I’m not gonna borrow money from a customer, as you well know.”  

The problem is that really wouldn’t be a big deal for you to offer him a loan or give it as a gift really. You love this pub. You love the people working here and the patrons and coming in for a drink or a meal or simply a chat and a laugh. It’s your safe haven. No one ever hardly ever bothers you here. No one asks you for a selfie or asks you about when more music is coming out. No one tugs at your sleeve or try to sneakily take a photo of you. Here, you are normal. And it would devastate you to see the Holland boys lose it all when you know you can help. You have more money than you know what to do with.  

However, you know there’s no arguing with him when he’s got that look on his face so you don’t, just keep sipping on your cherry coke as your foot taps along to the song on the radio. From inside the kitchen you can hear the faint sound of the Holland twin's laughter.  

Tom turns away from you to sort out the whiskey glasses on the counter behind him. But when picking up a glass he fumbles, and it falls out of his hand and lands right on his foot, though it fortunately doesn’t break.

“Ah, fucking bastard!” he shouts, grabbing hold of his injured foot.

“You shouldn’t swear in church, you know” ¨you say, as you finish your coke.

He looks at you indignantly, pouting like a child, “well, lucky for me, this is a pub.”

“You say potato, I say tomato, now make me a real drink.”

“For fucks sake, darlin’, you gotta eat something.”

***

So, it’s either late or early, depending how you look on it. On tube stations all across London early worker are already gathering on the platforms to take their commute to work. Not you. Not Tom either.  

Now, Tom is an early riser and has been since childhood. His nanna used to say that he had energy enough for three children. Despite regular closing shifts at the pub he likes to be up at dawn. Says he likes to get an hour at the gym and a walk with Tessa in before he heads to the pub to make sure everything is in order. After having checked with Sam that everything is stocked for the day, he has his protein loaded breakfast while ordering supplies or read through whatever paper work he need to be on top off before opening up the pub for the day.  

Tom hates having this routine disturbed.

So, it goes like this. Harry had been the bartender most of that night, since Tom had ‘other business to take care of’. Whenever Harry was bartender he’d usually spent more time drinking with you than he did serving up the other costumers. When Tom came back and saw the state of you, he’d sent you home, telling you that you’d had enough for one night and asking Harrison to walk you home. Then he’d giving Harry a proper telling off. You had dutifully walked with Harrison to your apartment, thanked him sweetly, and then as soon as you saw that he had passed the corner walked into another pub just across the street for more. It wasn’t as charming a place as The Hollands and their bartender sure wasn’t as handsome or as fun to annoy as the regular one at Hollands. But in a pinch, anything will do.  

Upon closing hour however, as you made your way home, you’d discovered that your keys were missing. Being absolutely wasted this did not worry you in the slightest. You just strolled back on unsteady legs to The Hollands to see if you’d dropped them there. Tom, who had closed the pub for the night, was still in. From the windows you could see him going through stacks of paperwork in front of him, a frown on his face. Upon hearing you knocking on the window at 2 am he’d jumped out his chair to see what was going on. When seeing you three sheets to the wind, dressed in a thin dress on a cold summer’s night the frown on his face had gotten worse.

Now here you are, in his apartment, in the dead of the night, and he’s offering you a plate of tortellini. Tessa had been overjoyed to see you and after having been allowed to greet you she had then been sent to her place and out of the way of your drunk, stumbling feet.

“But I hate tortellini” you whine.

“Christ sake, Popstar, just eat the damn food”

“No, I hate it, Tom, I hate it so much, it makes me think of- of- ” you hiccup.

“Are you actually crying right now?”

“It makes me think of- of - cheese sauce and -”

“Sorry, but what now?”

“And – I – I – I hate cheese sauce”. You’re full on sobbing and he just stares at you in disbelief.  

Then, somehow the world seems fall the wrong way around. It takes you a second to realize that you’ve slid down on the floor and that you’re staring up at the ceiling. Tom’s strong arm take a hold of you and he guides you to a sitting position, leaned up against the wall. With your face in his hands he stares at you in indignation but there’s something else there too. You’re drunk enough to dare to call it tenderness.  

Suddenly you’re aware that you’re sobbing, but you can’t remember why that is.

“Fuck who knows” he responds and when you give out a sound that’s something halfway between a sob and a laugh he starts laughing too. “If I make you something else to eat, will you eat it then? You’ll feel better in the morning if you do”.

Your head feels heavy, so you lean it against his hand and nod. “No cheese sauce, please”.

He rolls his eyes, but he’s laughing too. “Sure, no cheese sauce for Pop Princess.”

“Oi!” You call out “You promised to never to call me that!” Pop Princess was the title the tabloids had given you early on in your career. He keeps smiling, but it’s a gentle smile, and trace the frown between your eyebrows with his finger, as if he’s trying to erase it.

“Will you please just sit here while I cook?”

You nod again, too tired to say anything. He gets up, and you can hear some pouring water and then he places a glass of water in your hand. “Drink” he orders, then he’s gone again, and you can hear the clattering of pots and pans as he starts cooking. You’re just staring into the wall, trying to make it stop spinning; limbs heavy with sleep and whiskey, a nice buzzing numbness in your head.

Then he’s in front of you again, looking at you with a frown “I thought I told you to drink that” and you look at the full glass clasped in your hands. “Seriously, you’ll feel better if you do”.

You roll your eyes “oh, please, Tommy. Remember who you’re speaking to. I’m the local drunk, there’s no need to lecture me in hangovers”. But you do as you’re told and chug down your drink and hand him the empty glass. “Good girl” he says and gets back to his cooking. Before long the delicious scent of food is spreading through the tiny, cramped kitchen.

You start humming a song you wrote years ago but never released, low enough so you think Tom won’t hear you over the sizzling pan. But he does.  

“What’s that?” he asks, curiosity in his voice.

“Oh” you say, leaning your head back against the wall as you close your eyes in the hope that the world will stop spinning. “Just a song.”

Everything goes quiet for a while and you find yourself wondering if you’ve fallen asleep. But then you hear his voice. “Keep singing, please”.  

It surprises you, the amount of tenderness in his words; such a gentle bequest. So, you do as you’re told. In a voice raspy from the whiskey but sweet from his kindness you sing.

“I’ve been holding my breath, I’ve been counting to ten, 

Over something you said, I’ve been holding back tears 

 While you’re throwing back beers, I’m alone in bed

You know I, I’m afraid of change, Guess that’s why we stay the same, 

So tell me to leave, I’ll pack my bags, get on the road, 

Find someone that loves you better than I do, darling, I know, 

'Cause you remind me every day, I’m not enough, but I still stay”

You trial off and he keeps quiet too and goes silent again. Then he slides down beside you, a plate of pasta carbonara in his hands which he offers you along with a fork. “Eat” he orders gently. You do, and it tastes delicious.

“God, Tom, you could rival Sam in the kitchen”.

He snorts but you persist. “Seriously Tommy, I’d hire you as a private chef if I didn’t know you’d be an insufferable employee”.

He snorts again, but you can tell he’s amused. “Wow, thanks a lot”

“Seriously, you’d always complain about my lack of organization, or the fact that I keep all of my face masks in the refrigerator, or that I never have any food at home or that I don’t eat at regular hours or that I sometimes just forget to eat and just have a Red bull for dinner instead or that I – ”

“Jesus Christ” he interrupts you “who the fuck let you be an adult? What’s wrong with you!?”

You’re wolfing down your food, so it takes you a moment to answer. “Someone said my problem was ‘a mind-boggling lack of general discipline and a staggeringly low ability to organise’” you finally say.

“Who said that? I mean they’re not wrong”.

“You said that” you point out as you finish your plate of carbonara. “Also, this was scrumptious, and also, may I sleep here tonight?”

He looks at you in disbelief “Yeah, duh, I’m not kicking you out? I mean, I thought that was the general idea of this”.

He grabs a hold of your plate and takes your hand in his other as he guides you both up to a standing position. He places the plate among the other dirty pans in the sink and then lead you to his bathroom. Giving you a new toothbrush, he orders you to brush your teeth while he changes his sheets. He hands you a shirt to sleep in and when you’ve changed you argue for a good 10 minutes while about who’s to sleep on the couch before he puts his foot down and say he’ll ban you from his pub unless you take the bed instead of him. So, you do.  

His bed soft and comfortable and smell of his detergent. From the living room you can hear Tessa’s deep breaths and the sound of Tom tossing around on the sofa. You wonder how uncomfortable he is.

“Tommy just come in here instead” you call out, voice drowsy.

“No, I told you, you take the bed”

You snort. As if you were going to give this bed up, no chance. Not now that you know how comfortable it is.  

“Yeah, duh” you answer. “Wasn’t planning on taking the sofa, but the bed’s big enough for the two of us, innit?”

Dead silence from the living room. Even Tessa seems to have been struck silent.

“You sure?”

You sigh. “Yeah, I'm sure, for fuck’s sake Tommy, just come in here”.

You hear the sound of footsteps slowly making their way across the floor, then he’s in the doorway. Clad in a pair of black boxers and a black t-shirt, awkwardly scratching the back of his head as he avoids looking at you.

You pull down the covers and he lay down beside you, keeping his distance in the bed. You have your backs against each other, staring into separate walls and even through the whiskey you can tell this is awkward. You want to ask him to hold you, but you’re scared he doesn’t want it. Scared he doesn’t even want to lay beside you. You are after all just a costumer in his bar. A costumer you know he can’t afford to lose.

You don’t know how long you lay there in silence, his scent surrounding you, the soft sound of his breath lulling you into further relaxation but eventually you drift off to sleep.  

When you wake, he’s gone. A note on his pillow tells you he’s gone to the gym, telling you to take anything you want for breakfast and just leave the keys at the pub later.  

When you close the door behind you you can’t help but feel that something tender happened in there, something important; but you know he doesn’t feel the same.

***

It’s Monday night, as Tom has been so kind to remind you off, and you’re plastered.  

Earlier the pub had been full to rim of football supporters shouting and singing and sharing pints before a big game, filling the entire place with an excited buzz. Now they’ve all gone off to cheer for their heroes on the field and only the patrons remain.  

Harry is bartender tonight, and Tom has placed himself in the back of the pub, a stack of paper in front of him that he keeps leering at. With a drink in your hand and a happy-go-lucky attitude you seat yourself on the opposite side of his table, determent to cheer him up.

“’m gonna write a song about you.” You inform him, voice only somewhat slurry.

“Go on then.” He doesn’t look up at you, just jots something down on the form in front of him. He’s wearing glasses tonight and they make him look so handsome you want to scream in frustration.

“Well, what rhymes with Tom? Rum!”

“Oh, Christ, no. No, I’ve changed my mind.”

“Tom, he serves rum and tequila.” You sing. “Wait, what rhymes with tequila?”

“Please don’t”

“Heliophilia!”

“Okay, ’m literally begging you not to do this.” He’s looking at you now, his caramel eyes filled with both amusement and genuine dread. You don’t listen, no, you sing.

“Tom, he serves Rum and tequila,

he loves the sun, it’s called heliophilia

his pub needs fundin’, he lives in London”

“Wow. That is a hell of a forced rhyme, pop princess.”

“No, no wait!”

“Wait? I will literally pay you to stop”.

But then you start singing for real, in a voice so sultry that it makes him freeze mid motion, hand just about to turn the page over.

“Have you’ve seen my bartender

he’ll serve you whiskey, he’ll pour you rum

so sweet it’ll make you tender

but all the whiskey in Tennessee

couldn’t have that man agree

to ever share a drink with thee

no, all that sweetness’s just for me

cause babe, he’s my bartender

Yes, have you’ve seen my bartender

He’ll hand you wine, he’ll sell you gin

I think it’s a sign when he hands me my wine

When hand’s touching hand, skin touches skin”

Tom seem to be frozen in place when you stop, and over at the bar you hear Harry give a loud whistle. “Fucking hell, popstar” he cheers.

Tom still doesn’t say anything, just observes you, seemingly speechless. And maybe you’re imagining it, but he’s cheeks seem pinker than usual.

"Well, at least I didn’t rhyme rum with cum” you say, trying to get a reaction out of him. And then “I did think about doing it though” and you lift your glass to him as if in a toast before you down it.

He snorts, back to his normal self and stare down at the paper again.

“Now, honestly, Tom. What did that piece of paper ever do to you?”

“Huh?”

“You’re staring at it like you want to set fire to it. You’d like me to do it for you?”

“No thanks, reckon he’d sue”.

“Who is he?” you lean over the table and closer to him and you swear you can practically see him ordering himself not to look down at your cleavage. “Is he god?” you whisper in mock horror. “Cause, I wouldn’t worry too much, Tommy. You see, God can’t sue. Well, someone in America tried to sue Satan once and they couldn’t cause they couldn’t hand him the papers. Turns out Satan hasn’t got an address. Reckon the same goes with God”

He rolls his eyes “oh, this guy definitely has got an address. He lives in Knightsbridge.” And then, in a voice unusually bitter he adds “posh twat”.

“Oy” you warn, jokingly, “those are my neighbourhoods'”.  

A sound somewhere between a scoff and a laugh escapes him “Oh please” he laughs “please, you might live in Primrose Hill now, but you’re not Knightsbridge posh. Sorry to disappoint, Pop Princess”.

You glare, but it’s all in good humour. “So, who is this not-God-but-rich-as-God man sending you paper?”

The humour disappears from his face. “Downey, from the bank”.  Then he turns to the bar and shouts, “Harry, hand me a pint, ye?”

“And a whiskey for me, please” you request sweetly.

“No way, Harry, she’s cut off for the night. Tell Sam to make her something to eat” he orders his younger brother who rolls his eyes but obediently begin to head into to the kitchen.

“Not tort -” you begin shouting as an instruction.

“Not tortellini” he shouts at the same time. “And no cheese sauce either” he then adds.

You smile at him and this time you swear he’s blushing.

“Who’s Downey? You ask. And you know you’re prying, but you also know that Tom needs help with something and if there’s anything you can do to help, you will.  

“A bank man who wants me to pay my loans back”. He answers eventually after a long silence, when he figures you’re not going to give up and talk about something else. Harry comes back and hands Tom a pint and then leaves to take care of a costumer at the bar.

“A bank man, who lives in Knightsbridge?” You ask, bemused.

Tom smiles “oh, believe you me, Downey’s not your average bank clerk.” Then, in a serious tone, “look, I know you want to help, but there’s nothing you can do, ye? So drop it”.

“But I-”

“Drop it. Seriously, pop princess, there’s nothing you can do, I’ll figure something out”. He doesn’t sound harsh and the way he looks at you is positively adoring. Then he does something unexcepted. He reaches over the table and pulls a loose string of hair behind your ear. It’s a soft and sweet gesture and you want to reach over and kiss him but before you can he removes his hand and seconds later Harry places a dish of steaming pasta carbonara in front of you. You smile and thank him and he makes his way back to the bar.  

You eat in silence for a while as he continues to read through stashes of papers. You decide to leave the subject, for now at least.

“Yours is better, by the way”. He looks up at you, confused. “Your carbonara” you clarify. “I mean, Sam is an incredible chef and you’re lucky to have him, but yours is my favourite”.  

His cheeks heat up, again.

***

R E A D    P A R T   T W O     H E R E

[pi-cat000]

MSA: Take Back The Future (part 3)

Summary: Vivi and Arthur travel back in time to the beginning of Hellbent. Neither of them are okay. 

(Part 1) (Part 2)

.

Mystery, instead of answering Vivi’s questions, leaps over the seat dividing the front and back areas of the van, exiting out the back doors.

“Wait, ” Vivi yells after Mystery, “get to back here and explain what happened to my memories.”

/It is not a tale that can be simply told. Not right now when we may be in danger/

Arthur thinks kitsune turned dog sounds slightly strained but it’s hard to really tell with Mystery’s weird telepathy. When the meaning of words are projected right into your brain some of the nuance is lost.

“Who is Shiromori? Why is she attacking us?” Vivi tries, following to glare at Mystery who circles the van, barely paying attention to the two of them. “Just answer one question!”

His mechanical arm twitches of its own accord and he eyes it nervously.  To hell with it. Arthur frees his hand and begins to feel about for the quick release lever hidden under a panel on his upper arm. After the van crash and almost getting thrown to his death, the arm had been too banged up to safely remove, jamming in place.  Best to be rid of it now, before everything when to shit all over again.

The sound of his heavy metal arm hitting the ashfelt draws Vivi’s attention and she turns to give him a quizzical expression.

“Better off then on,” He explains, “Wasn’t really working that well anyway. Hopefully, that’ll get rid of the curse as well.” Honestly, this cruse is the least of his worries.

Vivi exhales and Arthur can see the stress pinching her mouth, pulling it down into an uncharacteristic frown, “If the curse is specifically attached to your arm then removing it might work. On the other hand, if it’s anything like the one that got my memories then who the hell knows what will work. I certainly don’t. Apparently, I don’t know a lot of things.”

The last sentence is louder, directed at Mystery. There is no response from the dog who is staring off into the middle distance, head to one side like he is listening intently for something.  Arthur offers Vivj an uneasy shrug. He has his own questions for Mystery regarding Vivi’s memories, his arm, and the night they both went missing. However, his most recent run-in with dead-Lewis has him quickly reordering his priorities. None of the answers are going to mean much if he’s dead. Again…

Speaking of which… On the horizon, a purple light flares, glowing brightly against the dark backdrop. Arthur’s mouth goes suddenly dry and limbs feel very cold. Yeah, that seamed about right…

/You called this spirit Lewis?/ Mystery turns his head to examine him, expression troubled. /Are you sure?/  

He gives a short nod, eyes darting from Mystery then back to the road. It looks like Mystery is planning something based on how his fur is glowing red. He’d seen a similar red glow on the night of Lewis’s disappearance and during the confrontation outside his Uncle’s workshop. How much did Mystery know about Lewis? The question sticks in his mind, painfully heavy.

“Lewis? You mean the purple fire ghost? The one that caused the van crash?” Vivi steps up next to him, eyes locked onto the truck which grows quickly larger, “How are we going to stop it from running us all over?”

It’s too late to try a drive or run away now. Even if he decides to run there is a steep rocky slope on one side and a sharp climb on the other. If he did make it down by some miracle there was just flat desert and no cover for miles. Arthur doesn’t voice this observation instead commenting in a voice several octaves higher than normal, “I don’t think you need to worry about the ghost running you over. I’m pretty sure he’s only after me. So…ah…maybe don’t stand near me?”

Why? Why was Lewis trying to hurt him? In his mind’s eye, Lewis and Mystery meld together into a nightmare inferno of fire, teeth and death.

“I don’t want you to get run over either.” Vivi’s voice sounds faint, coming to him like it has travelled a great distance. Too much fear packed into too short a timeframe is making it harder and harder to concentrate. The ice at her feet thickens into long sheets, which creep out over the road, freezing it solid. He is probably lucky his remaining arm hasn’t frozen off with how tight Vivi had been holding it. Maybe if he turns into a giant Arthur icicle and he can sit this whole thing out. The hysterical thought momentarily breaks through his mounting panic.  

/Wait./

Arthur can almost hear the crackle of fire and the hum of the truck's engine.

/ You should not be drawing on so much of this power at once! You’ll damage the seal further!/

“I’m not letting Arthur die again. Anything comes near us and I’ll make whoever it is, regret it… that includes you.”

Vivi steps out so she is positioned in the centre of the road.

/I can handle this confrontation. There are still many aspects to the situation that you remain unaware of./

“And how am I supposed to fix that if you won’t tell me anything.”

/ I swear I will explain when there is more time. I only ever wanted to protect you./

“I don’t believe you.”

Vivi snaps the final sentence and punctuates it with a sharp hand gesture aimed at the oncoming truck. Several lines of ice stretch out and down the road, racing away from Vivi to meet the oncoming vehicle. Shining an ethereal blue, the frost coats the road’s surface, smoothing it over. Arthur catches the briefest glimpse of skeletal Lewis before the truck hits the ice sheets and the wheels suddenly lose traction.  The sound of metal crunching is deafening, accompanied by the hiss of water abruptly vaporising. Heat and cold collide in a cacophony cracking ice and explosion of steam.

A flash of bright purple fire. Mystery disappears, obscured by the thick columns of steam. He finds himself being yanked to the side by Vivi just in time to watch the purple truck careen past in a shower of sparks and groaning metal. At such high speeds, it rams straight into and through the guardrails separating the road from the rocky slope. Stunned, Arthur watches it disappear over the edge. If Lewis hadn’t already been dead then Arthur might have been worried. The sound of banging and crashing, as the truck presumably roles several times, has him physically wincing. Scratch that, he was worried. Very worried. Worried enough that it overtakes his mental panic and replaces it with deep concern. How durable were ghosts? He doesn’t know and that scares him. 

“Vivi! What the hell,” He finally manages to spit out, breaking his panic-induced stupor. He tries to rush past her, intent on checking for any signs of Lewis. He promptly slips. The combination of ice and his lack of a second arm throws off his balance and he ends up falling backward. He is saved from a collision with the ground by Vivi who seemed to now have supernatural levels of balance and was unaffected by the slippery surface.

“I …wow. That was… something.” Vivi breaths, examining the road still covered in planes of ice as if not quite believing it.

“Help me to the edge,” He interrupts, trying and failing to stand straight collapsing back on her, “I need to see if he’s okay,”

“Who’s okay? The ghost?"

“Yes.”

"You want to see if the ghost is okay? You said it was trying to hurt you?”

Arthur can practically see the concern and confusion now hanging over Vivi as she looks down from where she's holding him up by his one good arm.

“It’s just…a misunderstanding or something. I…we…might know this ghost.”

“What?”

“Just help me check.” He motions with his remaining arm. Visible through the plums of steam are thicker lines of darkened smoke coming from the space where the truck had disappeared.

....

Note: I’m Sorry to everyone who’s showed interest in this AU but i’m not sure if i’ll continue this since i’ve lost motivation.  Here are some of the more coherent plot notes if people are interested in this AU. Feel free to ask questions if u have any :) . 

...

-   Shiromori shows up directly after Lewis’s crash, distracting Mystery. With all the steam obscuring their vision Arthur and Vivi don’t realise that Shiromori has arrived immediately, and there is enough time to briefly look for Lewis. 

- Lewis makes it out of the truck crash only slightly worse for wear and tries to attack Arthur. Vivi moves to defend Arthur, then Arthur has to defend Lewis and it’s all very awkward for everyone. 

- Lewis sees how scared Arthur is a reconsiders his revenge plot, hesitating long enough to get some dialogue in. 

 - Arthur finally gives Vivi a brief Lewis overview (sans the whole ‘he almost threw me off a fake cliff thing’). Vivi is suspicious and somewhat unconvinced. Lewis is slightly confused when Vivi starts referring to the alternate time line. 

- Not time for further discussion because Mystery is fighting Shiromori and, since he had warning this time, he’s winning. 

(fight scene stuff. Vivi rushes in to do something idk this part is not planned.) 

Vivi overused ice abilities. 

Lewis and Arthur have a moment alone. 

Vivi, slightly untrusting of Mystery, ends up stepping to stop the two from fighting. (Vivi ends up saving  Shiromori maybe??? a parallel  to the original timeline). A dramatic moment where Vivi rushes in ( maybe takes a blow for Shiromori idk would depend on Shiromori’s backstory) and ends up injured. 

- ??? makes an appearance, takes over Vivi instead of Mystery. 

Some background world building stuff

- Vivi’s ice powers might become unsealed and she is vulnerable to ??? (spiritual energy is damaging to humans if too much is used at once or if is not used correctly)

- Yukino family are spiritual channels making them both more powerful and more vulnerable. Mystery holds a seal to the ability and it eats up a tails worth of power to maintain. Same deal with Shiromori, Mystery holds a seal to keep her fully realised abilities in check which also eats up a lot of power.

- The seal is damaged when Mystery is hurt

- Arthur is unaffected by the ice because he’s got some odd time based supernatural power which has bonded to vivi spiritual signtaure as well. This is the reason ??? want to possess Arthur. One possible resolution was for Arthur to figure out how to rewind time to the seconds before Vivi gets possessed, giving her a chance to defeat ???. It takes a lot of power which Lewis ends up giving to him. 

[ace-beef]

AH the Musical bits I love

- the way Michael looks like he’s focusing so hard on keeping to his rhythm in the sync at the beginning 

- “Geeeoooff! Tell us, whAt are we dOIN’ BOI? LET ME HEAR IT BABEEYY!” 

- Michael’s soft “what are we doooing” whisper

- Geoff’s face through the entirety of that part and the song, he looks 10000% done with them all skhfjdds 

- “what’s the last game Lindsay won?” “HEY!”

- “everybody shUT THE FUCK! UP!” [pause] “we’re playing GTA!” 

- the sprunk clusterfuck at the beginning of the first race 

- Gavin jumping onto the part of the track where the others were for the sole purpose to fuck with them 

- the moment Ryan said “I’m somewhat in the air” I knew exactly was about to happen 

- Fiona’s dress during the Still in the Air song!!! It’s so pretty!!! 

- the fact that the lyrics of Still in the Air screamed of a villain song yet the fairly calm and cheerful music of it was the complete opposite of a villain song... like it’s in a major key and is all light and boppy 

- “I’m falling down now, that Newton’s a dick, and soon I’ll be dealing with all of you pricks” 

- how ‘still in the air’ is a joke that is still being made despite the fact it’s origins were back in 2014, normally AH jokes die after like a year at most but somehow the ‘still in the air’ joke hasn’t died and ended up getting a song centered around it

- Fiona and Lindsay at the end ESPECIALLY Fiona dabbing before calmly walking off 

- “he’s back there exerting all over my back end” 

- “sorry Jeremy” “whahappened” [Michael sprunks Jeremy] “AAAAAA” [Michael cackles manically] 

- Jeremy during the entirety of Get Sprunked where he’s just going ape shit in the back

- Michael’s outfit in Get Sprunked 

- “look at you, passing me, as determined as can be, with your foot on the gas, you know what? KISS MY ASS” 

- Michael and Jeremy collapsing to the floor dead at the end of Get Sprunked

- the soft guitar in the Team OG song 

- the fact that neither Geoff or Jack can hold a tune that well but goddamnit the song made me soft anyway 

- “where would I be without Geoffrey” 

- “know that to me you’re worth 100 Gavin Frees”

- “Jack, I wish I could fire you” “I-I think the line is actually ‘I wish I could quit you’” “w-what’d I say?” 

- THE HUG AT THE END OF THE TEAM OG SONG WOW I LOVE MY INTERNET DADS :’)

- the shortest round of Offence Defense we have ever seen

- the moment Jack mentions that his team is up against the Dusk Boys the three of them instantly start fuckin’ around “duuuusskkk” 

- “the O2 has... depleteeedd”

- Jack with the backwards camera to see two black cars go spinning as Gavin screams

- THE DUSK BOYS OUTFITS IN HARD TO BREATHE LIKE DAMN THEY’RE LOOKIN’ GOOD 

- just everything that Gavin does throughout the entire Hard to Breathe song is hilariously funny 

- I am SURE Alfredo has eyeliner on and I’m HERE FOR IT

- the fact that the song sounds like a love song but is actually 100% just about oxygen is fucking hilarious 

- Gavin pretending to choke and the others just breaking out of their boyband characters to panic and make an attempt to help him

-“according to Wikipedia the transfer of oxygen into blood is called diffusion” “oohh y e a h” 

- Gavin dropping his sunglasses on the camera before fumbling to put them back on his face 

- “don’t know how you work but Google makes it sound true” 

- “in 8th grade my science project was about you” (wtf is 8th grade in British language?? Like,, year 7? Year 9?? Idk) 

- Gavin’s wide stance and hip thrust at the end of Hard to Breathe 

- the Dusk Boys high five with them all genuinely laughing and smiling at the end of Hard to Breathe IT MAKES ME FEEL SOFT AND FUZZY 

- “we can thrink-” [realises mistake] “I’M THRINKIN’” 

- “Alfredo do not take deep breaths! Take tiny sharp breaths!” 

- “this works out perfectly because Jeremy was dropped right at the end!”

- the fact that you can tell that Gavin it trying so hard not to laugh during the entire Gavin is a Prick segment

- Sarah sticking her middle fingers up at Gavin with a face of absolute shit-eating glee

- that shot of Matt’s face on the right with a faded out Matt on the left which looks like that Monsters Inc meme 

- “be strong for mummy” 

- Gavin hitting the webcam with his Matt-ball “you fuckin’ nailed the webcam!” 

- “Lindsay what are you in?” “I’m in baby” 

- Lindsay looks GREAT during Lindsay Wins by the way like I never thought I’d say this about Lindsay but after seeing that song she could punch me in the face and I’d be happy 

- “man, children at the office plus kids at home?? SHIIIIT”

- that black and white shot of Lindsay with the crown 

- “Michael shut the FUCK up and make me a sandwich!” 

- at the end “thanks guys bye!” YOU HAVE NO RIGHT BEING THAT CUTE LINDSAY 

- “Quick! Lindsay! Hit Jeremy! Kill that man!” 

- GOD literally everything about the FAHC song like literally this song slaps and I listen to it on repeat as well as watching it over and over again 

- SO. MANY. SLO MO. SHOTS. THEY’RE ALL BEAUTIFUL 

- that Mag King laugh after the opening chorus which I didn’t notice at first is just,,,,, ILLEGAL.... but like in a good way 

- that shot of them all walking in a line like they all look so good wtf 

- THE IN CHARACTER BIT IN THE HEIST ROOM especially the fact that the Vagabond sits there motionless throughout the entire bit

- the lil slo mo suit up shots like somehow they’re all so aesthetically pleasing to watch especially Jack putting on the shirt, Gavin’s face instantly becoming emotionless after he’s got the glasses on and RYAN FUCKING HAYWOOD WITH THE MASK WHILE STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA 

- the shot of Ryan and Jack walking along the pavement is really satisfying and idk why 

- “if heaven’s really there we’re only getting in there by stealing the key” THIS!! This line right here is just PEAK FAHC like the vibes from that line my god

- GAVIN TRYING TO CATCH THE PIGEONS WHY IS THIS SO CUTE??? And it somehow fits in perfectly even though it technically does not fit with the ‘badass vibe’ at all 

- that FLAWLESS briefcase pass between the Battle Buddies  

- Geoff’s, Gavin’s, and Michael’s faces in the slow mo running shot 

- just,, Jack in the slow mo running shot,,,, this man is too good for this world

- Lindsay aggressively brandishing a knife like wow EDIT: I JUST NOTICED THAT SHE HAS A TINY GARBO IN HER OTHER HAND WTF I’M LAUGHING SO HARD

- Gavin spinning that briefcase 

- Gavin getting mugged at the end which was simply the icing on the cake of the whole song